[MOL] Re: The realities of mid-life [00392] Medicine On Line

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[MOL] Re: The realities of mid-life

Did I get a laugh out of this one!

> Mid-life is when you go to the doctor and you realize you are now so old,
> have to pay someone to look at you naked.
> The good news about mid-life is that the glass is still half-full...of
> the bad news is that it won't be long before your teeth are floating in
> Mid-life has hit you when you stand naked in front of a mirror and can see
> rear end without turning around.
> You know you are getting old when you go for a mammogram,
> and realize it's the only time someone will ask you to appear topless in
> You know you've crossed the mid-life threshold when you're in the grocery
> and you hear the Muzak version of "Stairway to Heaven" in the produce
> department.
> Mid-life is when you bounce (a lot), but you don't bounce back.  (It's
more like
> Splat!)
> Mid-life brings the wisdom that life throws you curves......and that
you're now
> sitting on your biggest ones.
> It's very hard to "get jiggy with it" in mid-life.....jiggly, yes; jiggy,
> Mid-life is when your 1970s Body-by-Jake now includes Legs-by-Rand
> (more red and blue lines than an accurately scaled map of the state of
> Wisconsin).
> Mid-life is when you want to grab every firm young lovely in a tube top
> scream, "Listen, honey, even the Roman Empire fell, and those things will
> Mid-life can bring out your angry, bitter side. You look at your
> beeper-wearing, know-it-all teenager and think, "For this I have stretch
> Mid-life is when you start to repeat yourself.....and your chins follow
> Mid-life is when your memory really starts to go.  The only thing you
> retain is water. .............
> You become more reflective in mid-life. You start pondering the "big"
> -- what is life, why am I here... how much Healthy Choice ice cream can I
> before it's no longer a healthy choice?

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