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Bess,
I just read your post and maybe we are kind of in the same boat as far as not knowing that hospice was NOT going to treat, just alleviate symptoms. That is fine and good but I didn't know that it meant that nature would be taking its course rather than having the aredia to help w/ the calcium. I'm fine w/ her not having chemo, it wasn't helping anymore. But the aredia helped her naseau & her fatigue. I agree with you Bess about ultimately, it is her Oncologist that can be in charge. As much as I wish he would have been more involved, he was nice enough this morning to tell us that in the future, we can do these aredia treatments at home for as long as Mom wants. I realize this is prolonging the inevitable and I dont want her hurting. I told her last night that even though I love her so much and of course I want her here as long as possible, in NO way do I want her staying her for our benefit. It is totally up to her and when she is tired of all of it, then for her to let us know. She is a tad disoriented, just a tad but I have no doubt that we will know when would be more humane for this to stop. She did tell me that she was a little tired but she was going to take one day at a time. That is fine with me. I have really tried to cherish this part and it is hard not to cry whenever I think of 'this might be the last time....' but I constantly have to remind myself of the big picture. Bess, you hang in there.
Love you,
Dusti
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From: BesTom@AOL.COM[SMTP:BesTom@AOL.COM]
Reply To: mol-cancer@lists.meds.com
Sent: Friday, May 26, 2000 10:10 AM
To: mol-cancer@lists.meds.com
Subject: Re: Re: [MOL] Good Afternoon
Dear Dusti:
I recently took Tom home from the hospital on hospice and am very
concerned as well about this not treating business. The nurse who comes once
a week never takes blood even. They do not believe in treating, only
relieving symptoms. For example, if my husband got an infection, they might
not treat it. Of course, we can always go to the emergency room of a
hospital or Calvary acute care cancer center. But in that case, we would be
OFF hospice and have to start again on our own. Fortunately, our onc. is
"in charge" of the case. As long as Tom is breathing and not suffering too
much, no matter how confined to our bedroom he is, I'd like to keep him
going. From my end Hope things work out better for you. Love, Bess
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