Re: [MOL] Brenda- Emotional side of cancer [00087] Medicine On Line

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Re: [MOL] Brenda- Emotional side of cancer

Chris, your comments are far from babbling, and show remarkable
sensitivity and awareness of some of "other" challenges facing
cancerers, things that we might not feel comfortable expressing
ourselves (again, having to be "strong" and all that!) Your father is
very lucky. Love, Joicy

CCR0417@AOL.COM wrote:
> PST huh?  I should be familiar with that too - but it never occured to me
> that it could apply in this situation.  You're right Lillian!
> I think that we all hurt so much, for our loved ones and for ourselves. I'm
> not trying to say that there is nothing to be thankful for - nothing could be
> more untrue. I thank God for every day that my father is here, that he is
> doing much better than any of us expected. I thank God for Barb's progress
> and many others here.
> Then the monster rears its head yet again - it wants to hurt our Kathy - but
> it will lose this round too. Still it hurts; it hurts her, it hurts her loved
> ones, and it hurts us. Can we compare our pains? In one sense, yes; but in
> the greater reality, no.  If my loved one has a broken leg it doesn't make my
> toothache any less painful.  But neither can I imagine that I know the pain
> of that broken leg or the pain of not being able to walk (unless I have
> *been* unable to walk myself). I believe the person with cancer (basing this
> on my father and others I've known) feel a great deal of isolation arising
> from the physical confinement, the fear, the treatment, the uncertainty, and
> the alienation of the uneducated, but well-meaning others. I too felt that
> isolation but I had other things to do and to think about - I had a life to
> run, a job to do, and a loved one to care for. My father had time - time to
> be tired, time to think, time to worry...but mostly he was sick.  He is a
> strong man and it took every bit of his strength AND mine AND his wife's AND
> my sister's AND his sisters to keep him going. We cried alone or with each
> other when HE wasn't watching.  He cried alone when NO one was watching.
> I'm not even sure WHY I am saying all this, but I just babble on...and
> on...lately.
> -chris
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