[MOL] Bess [00031] Medicine On Line


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[MOL] Bess



Bess, you know your husband better than anyone so you will make the correct
decision.  Bless you and hang in there.

Dusti
 

> ----------
> From: 	BesTom@AOL.COM[SMTP:BesTom@AOL.COM]
> Reply To: 	mol-cancer@lists.meds.com
> Sent: 	Saturday, April 29, 2000 11:27 AM
> To: 	mol-cancer@lists.meds.com
> Subject: 	[MOL] Tom Today
> 
> Dear Friends:
>     I just came home for an hour to get some things and check my emails.
> I 
> was so touched by all your messages.  I really can't say how and when the
> end 
> will come but it won't be easy.  Last night we asked our onc for an 
> assessment in front of Tom who has always been in denial about this.  The
> onc 
> told us that Tom was in a critical situation because they can't control
> the 
> infection--in fact although they're calling it pneumonia, they haven't 
> actually identified the infection so they're throwing every antibiotic
> they 
> have at him.  His breathing is also getting significantly worse.  He could
> 
> not use the little nose inserts but had to sleep with the stronger air
> mask 
> all night.  I also learned that his liver numbers are abnormal and this 
> morning he woke with a new pain in the liver area.  I guess all the chemo
> and 
> this additional junk and pills have destroyed that organ too.  Last night
> he 
> was saying he was ready to die and didn't want to suffer.  Our onc told me
> 
> privately we could put him on a morphine drip right then--when I mentioned
> 
> this to Tom he was horrified and said our onc was cruel (which is not
> true, 
> he's very kind, just honest).  If he makes it through the weekend and I
> think 
> he will, they are thinking of doing a bronchoscopy to try to "identify the
> 
> infection"  So what if they do and they treat it.  The bronchoscopy itself
> is 
> very invasive and it would only be a matter of time till a new infection 
> cropped up.  Tom says he won't leave the hospital till his infection is
> gone 
> no matter what our insurance says.  This morning, after sleeping with the 
> strong air mask and numerous percocets, decacadron, prednisone,
> nebulizers, 
> etc.  he woke up weak but feeling much better and said he was going to
> lick 
> this and make it.  I am at my wits end and really don't know what to do
> and 
> say knowing the sad sad reality of all this.
> He has been very unlucky--not even a year since diagnosis, no response to
> any 
> chemo which is probably what weakened his immune system to begin with.  
> Although he once told me he wanted to die at home, my instinct is he would
> be 
> very frightened and it would be better for him to be in the hospital.
> Will 
> let you all know what happens.  Love, Bess
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