Dear Joicy...thanks for making a rather dreary day a whole lot brighter!
God Bless.
John
-----Original Message-----
From: Becker, Joicy [mailto:Joicy.Becker@PTSEM.EDU]
Sent: Tuesday, March 28, 2000 9:26 AM
To: 'MOLers'; 'FaithTalk'
Subject: [MOL] a giggle for music-lovers...
Thought some of you might get a kick out of these...love, Joicy
===============
THESE ARE ACTUAL ANSWERS FROM STUDENTS ON MUSIC EXAMS
The principal singer of nineteenth century opera was called
pre-Madonna.
It is easy to teach anyone to play the maracas. Just grip the neck
and shake him in rhythm.
Gregorian chant has no music, just singers singing the same lines.
Sherbet composed the Unfinished Symphony.
All female parts were sung by castrati. We don't know exactly what
they sounded like because there are no known descendants.
Young scholars have expressed their rapture for the Bronze Lullaby,
the Taco Bell Cannon, Beethoven's Erotica, Tchaikovsky Cracknutter
Suite, and Gershwin's Rap City in Blue.
Music sung by two people at the same time is called a duel; if they
sing without music it is called Acapulco.
A virtuoso is a musician with real high morals.
Contralto is a low sort of music that only ladies sing.
Diatonic is a low calorie Schweppes.
Probably the most marvelous fugue was the one between the Hatfields
and the McCoys.
A harp is a nude piano.
The main trouble with a French Horn is that it is too tangled up.
An interval in music is the distance from one piano to the next.
The correct way to find the key to a piece of music is to use a
pitchfork.
Agitato is a state of mind when one's finger slips in the middle of
playing a piece.
Refrain means don't do it. A refrain in music is the part you'd
better not try to sing.
I know what a sextet is but I'd rather not say.
Most authorities agree that music of antiquity was written long ago.
My favorite composer was Opus. Agnus Dei was a woman composer famous
for her church music.
Henry Purcell was a well-known composer few people have ever heard
of.
Johann Sebastian Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and
had a large number of children. In between he practiced on an old
spinster which he kept up in his attic.
Rock Monanoff was a famous post-romantic composer of piano concerti.
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