[MOL] things you learn [01061] Medicine On Line


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[MOL] things you learn




> >Subject: Fw: things you learn
> > >>         Things you can learn from having children:
> > >>         Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke . . . lots of
smoke.
> > >>         A six-year-old can start a fire with a flint rock even though
a
> > >> forty-year old      man says that it can only be done in the movies.
> > >>         If you spray furniture polish on dust bunnies and run over
them
> > >with
> > >> roller      blades, they can ignite.
> > >>         A four-year old's voice is louder than 200 adults in a
crowded
> > >> restaurant.
> > >>         If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not
> > >>         strong enough to rotate a 42 pound boy wearing a superman
cape.
> > >>         It is strong enough. However, to spread paint on all
fourwalls
> >of
> > >a 20
> > >>         by 20-foot room.
> > >>         Baseballs make marks on ceilings.
> > >>         When using the ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the
> > >>         ball up a few times before you get a hit.
> > >>         A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.
> > >>         The glass in windows, even double pane, does not stop a
> > >>         baseball hit by a ceiling fan.
> > >>         If you use a waterbed as home plate while wearing baseball
> > >>         cleats, it does not leak.  It explodes.
> > >>         A king-size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000
> > >>         square foot house four inches deep.
> > >>         Legos will pass through the digestive tract of a four-year
old.
> > >>         Duplo blocks will not.
> > >>         PlayDough and microwave should never be used in the same
> >sentence.
> > >>         Superglue is forever.
> > >>         McGuyver can teach us many things we don't want to know.
> > >>         Ditto Tarzan.
> > >>         No matter how much Jello you put in a swimming pool, you
> > >>         still can't walk on water.
> > >>         Pool filters don't like Jello.
> > >>         VCR's do not eject peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, even
> > >>         though TV commercials show they do.
> > >>         Garbage bags do not make good parachutes. Neither do
> > >>         embroidered bedsheets.
> > >>         Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.
> > >>         Always look in the oven before you turn it on.
> > >>         Plastic toys do not like ovens.
> > >>         Always look in the dryer before using it.
> > >>         A four-year old can break an arm in a rotating dryer.
> > >>         The fire department in our city has a response time of at
> > >>         least five minutes.
> > >>         The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make
> > >>         earthworms dizzy.
> > >>         It will, however, make cats dizzy.
> > >>         Cats throw up two times their body weight when dizzy.
> > >>         Quiet does not necessarily mean there is nothing wrong.


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