Re: [MOL] Advice/Suggestions Welcome [00647] Medicine On Line


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Re: [MOL] Advice/Suggestions Welcome



DEar Joy,

My wife was also diagnosed with a  very rare disease more than 5 years
ago and that also included the basic diagnosis of CUP (carcinoma of an
unknown primary). There is also another great individual on this forum
who also has that diagnosis, Jeanne Kissinger. And our wonderful
inspiration of the forum, Lil also has written about CUP and the
information surrounding this disease. If I may just interject and help a
little bit in this area. Not to be nosey, but just supportive:

Every individual that is affected by this and any malignancy experiences
many emotions, including the caregivers, you and I and all that love
these souls. While they are experiencing these emotions (hate, anger,
fear, denial, etc), we must let them as well as ourselves address each
emotion so that they can overcome by themselves while we are supporting
their needs and emotions. WE are all different and while we will be
going through these emotions, we all experience and address differently.
While we try to be supportive, we feel what is best for them is really
best for us.

May I suggest you start by reading, Dr. Bernie Siegels "Peace, LOve and
Healing" and Dr. Carl Simontons, The Healing Journey and Greg Andersons
"50 Essential Things to Do When the Diagnosis is Cancer". These three
books address all the issues that you and your Mother need  to know when
first diagnosed.

There is more, much more, and if and when you read this message, you may
have additional questions, we are here for you to help and reply in any
way we are able to. I know many more will respond in kind as well.

God Bless You,
marty auslander

Joy Ann Reckley wrote:
> 
> Hi all!  I have written about my mom who has adenocarcinoma unknown
> primary.  The past few days have been very rough for her.  I am not a
> doctor but I am a licensed social worker and I find that all my skills have
> been in vain.  I think she is depressed.  She feels myself and her her
> husband are harping on her about eating and drinking.  We have really
> backed off of pushing her to eat and drink but the past few days she has
> had barely anything.  She has dehydrated a few times in the past bit it
> doesn't seem to be that this time.  The usual signs of dehydration aren't
> there and she say that although she doesn't feel like eating, she is
> drinking.  In my observation not enough though.  She threw up several times
> yesterday and we called the doctor who prescribed her something for the
> nausea and it has gone away.  Maybe she had a 24 hour flu that has been
> going around here.  I know too that when she gets any kind of an infection
> that it will be twice as hard for her due to her low immune system after
> just completing her last round of chemo a week ago today.  How can you
> gently help someone eat and drink when they have no appetite?  What kinds
> have foods have you found helpful and tasteful.  Salting seasoning., and
> sugaring them hasn't seemed to work.  She is very frustrated and lays in
> bed most of the time and snaps at us when we ask her anything about
> anything.  I know too that the holidays are difficult for her as well as
> our family.  She isn't able to do all the do she usually does.  I have done
> it for her such as the baking, etc...  I know she isn't mad at us but I do
> think she's depressed and the usual ways of picking her spirits up haven't
> worked.  She says things like "I wish I could just run away" and "I'm so
> tired of being sick."  Any suggestions would be appreciated.  I feel stuck.
>  Thanks. Joy
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