RE: [MOL] Distraction [00282] Medicine On Line


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RE: [MOL] Distraction



Dear Brandi:  You're doing this simply because you obviously love this
person, and that's nothing to be ashamed of.  Also, the fact that you're
concerned about the possibility of being obsessed with the subject, is a
good sign, too.  I am a small cell lung cancer survivor -- nearly two years
since my diagnosis, and I've been clean for two years this coming March.  I
can tell you honestly, Brandi, that when you're going through chemo and
radiation, this is the focal point of your life -- trying to hold on.  Now
that I'm well, my main focus is how well I feel and how wonderful it is to
be alive.  To give you some insight, this last spring I learned that my
husband had been unfaithful to me during the entire ordeal.  It was
devastating.  We got a divorce.  In June I had a heart attack (because of
the radiation damage), and had a two-way bypass.  All this is behind me now,
and all I want to do is get on with my life and enjoy it.  Don't spoil what
there is by worrying about what might be.  I know this is hard to do, but it
can be done.  It'll be the best thing for your boyfriend and for you, too.
And, by the way, Robert Urich says there's no such word as "remission."  The
word is "cured."  Hang in there and be happy!  Your friend -- Kathy in Boise

-----Original Message-----
From: owner-mol-cancer@lists.meds.com
[mailto:owner-mol-cancer@lists.meds.com]On Behalf Of Lillian
Sent: Thursday, October 07, 1999 2:29 PM
To: mol-cancer@lists.meds.com
Subject: Re: [MOL] Distraction


Hi Brandi:  Cancer is a great shock not only to the body but the mind, it is
the feeling that one has lost control on their very being.  I am happy to
hear that your boyfriend is doing so well.  Do you feel he is the same
person or perhaps you feel he has changed in someway that you are not
accustomed too, that he has a secret little world that you really are not a
part of?  I really think in time that this will all even out for you, after
all it is difficult to love someone and see them walk the journey of cancer.
Don't be too hard on yourself.  Perhaps your just not talking to the right
people about cancer, why not a cancer support group?  Most people do not
understand cancer and tend to shy away from the subject which only gives you
negative vibes.  Hope this helps you, your friend, lillian


----- Original Message -----
From: <btague@uism.bu.edu>
To: <mol-cancer@lists.meds.com>
Sent: Thursday, October 07, 1999 9:51 AM
Subject: [MOL] Distraction


>      Hello All,
>
>      I'm at work and feeling extremely distracted today.
>
>      My boyfriend was diagnosed with AML this past May and as the
treatment
>      has gone on, I feel like I've gotten more and more obsessed by it to
>      the point that I feel like that's all I think/talk about.  Does
anyone
>      here feel like you almost obsess over the disease.  I'm not really
>      even sure if I remember what my life was like before all this
>      happened, or if I can even have a conversation with someone without
>      bringing up the cancer at least once.
>
>      Well, I guess I'm just doing a little ranting.  My boyfriend is doing
>      really well, he's in remission and only has one more round of chemo
>      left.  I shouldn't complain, but I'm worried that I'm losing friends
>      and possibly hurting my position at work because all I seem to be
able
>      to think about lately is cancer and treatment and what the next step
>      is, etc....
>
>      Anyways, I was just wondering if anyone had some advice on how to
>      train myself not to obsess about it so much.  I'd appreciate the
>      advice.
>
>      Thanks,
>      Brandi
>
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