[MOL] An oldie but goodie resurfaces....... [01193] Medicine On Line

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[MOL] An oldie but goodie resurfaces.......

 An oldie but goodie resurfaces.......
 A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly
 speak. After
 mass he asked the Monsignor how he had done. The Monsignor
 replied, "When I
 am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass
 of vodka next
 to the water glass.
 If I start to get nervous,
 I take a sip." So next Sunday he took the Monsignors advice.
 At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a
 drink.  He
 proceeded to talk up a storm. Upon his return to his office
 after mass, he
 found the following note on the door:
 1. Sip the Vodka, don't gulp.
 2. There are 10 Commandments, not 12.
 3. There are 12 Disciples, not 10.
 4. Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
 5. Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
 6. We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.
 7. The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and 
 the Spook.
 8. David slew Goliath, he did not kick the shit out of him.
 9. When David was hit by a rock and knocked off his donkey, don't say he 
 was stoned off his ass.
 10.    We do not refer to the cross as the "Big T"
 11.    When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said,
 "Take this and eat it for it is my body.
 He did not say "Eat me."
 12.    The Virgin Mary is not called "Mary with the Cherry."
 13.    The recommended grace before a meal is not:
 Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, yeah God.
 14.    Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at
 St. Peter's, not a Peter pulling contest at St. Taffy's.

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-----Original Message-----
From:	Cyber4NeNe@aol.com
Sent:	Wednesday, July 21, 1999 7:04 AM
To:	carylel@earthlink.net; jrb@webworldinc.com; houtz@cityworld.com; 
Marygene5@aol.com; MARKAYR@aol.com; Suzya@go-concepts.com; 
williejoe@earthlink.net; gmcmartin@juno.com; kelly.biele@alliedsignal.com; 
Ruffrdr25@aol.com; SSJeans@aol.com; YOBETTER@aol.com; LadySinger@aol.com; 
HOOKERTHOG@aol.com; JSTEPHEN@aol.com; Cpribbon43@aol.com; BARTPS@aol.com
Subject:	IT'S FUNNY (DON'T BREAK CHAIN)

An oldie but goodie resurfaces.......
A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly
speak. After
mass he asked the Monsignor how he had done. The Monsignor
replied, "When I
am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass
of vodka next
to the water glass.
If I start to get nervous,
I take a sip." So next Sunday he took the Monsignors advice.
At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a
drink.  He
proceeded to talk up a storm. Upon his return to his office
after mass, he
found the following note on the door:
1.	Sip the Vodka, don't gulp.
2.	There are 10 Commandments, not 12.
3.	There are 12 Disciples, not 10.
4.	Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5.	Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
6.	We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.
7.	The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and 
the Spook.
8.	David slew Goliath, he did not kick the shit out of him.
9.	When David was hit by a rock and knocked off his donkey, don't say he 
was stoned off his ass.
10.	We do not refer to the cross as the "Big T"
11.	When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said,
"Take this and eat it for it is my body.
He did not say "Eat me."
12.	The Virgin Mary is not called "Mary with the Cherry."
13.	The recommended grace before a meal is not:
Rub-A-Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, yeah God.
14.	Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at
St.
Peter's, not a Peter pulling contest at St. Taffy's.
The origination of this letter is unknown, but it brings good
luck to
everyone who passes it on. The one who breaks the chain will
have bad luck.
Do not keep this letter. Do not send money. Just forward it
to five or more
of your friends to whom you wish good luck. You will see that
something good
happens to you four days from now if the chain is not broken.
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