Oh, this is one of those kind of stories I think
I never mention because he still does embarrass me, I guess, and because he is
such a zero sum game. I have to laugh, talking about him. I spent a
lot of my youth crying about things he said and yelling at him..so I specially
have to laugh now that I am...grown-up...sort of.
Dad lives in a condo, which has a majority of
seniors. They have programs there. He has tried to go to some...but
just hasn't made friends like he wants to. It has been 8 years since my
mom died..he is definitely been looking for a companion.
One time, Tony went up to visit his folks with
Jeff and I stayed home and went to a picnic the condo was sponsoring with my
dad. He saw a lady he thought was pretty. So he goes and stands next
to her...everyone was watching people play bocci ball. My dad had a camera
in his hands. As soon as she turned his way, he flashed the camera in her
face. Smooth, huh???? Later I think he saw her somewhere around the
condo. He said she started screaming "you're crazy, you're
crazy" and high tailed it in the opposite direction. That really hurt
all his little feelings.
He keeps telling us; forever it seems, that he
is going to move back to Long Island or one of a couple of other places.
It's like a merry-go-round. The last few times, we were really
hoping...but he won't go.
We are the only three people, i.e., me, my son
and my husband; with whom he knows he can be himself and be
accepted.
Lori, I loved your story about your father
too. If only my father had done something like your's did for
charities. He thinks a lot more about people doing things for
himself.
His style, you probably already have feel
for. But if you're not sure, I'll tell you another story. He
discovered that someone he used to work with, but didn't know too well, lives
near here. He took Tony by to meet this man. When the man came out,
my dad started yelling to him things like..."how come you never call me
up...how come I always have to call you up first"...etc.
My father has done a lot for me and my
family. He helped us buy our house. He has helped us on several
occasions to pay doctor bills. But, if you can imagine, he does it with
such bad grace as to almost lose the credit for the good he does.
He was not always the man he is today. The
seeds were there...As I describe it to others who know him but don't see him
anymore, (people I occasionally talk to)...this includes the complete list of
friends and relatives of his and my mom....my father has been standing, for a
while on the cusp of serious tutti-fruitism. All we can do is watch,
wonder and try to catch him if he falls.
I have almost given up giving advice. I
mean, I still do, but I know that the chances that he will heed it are slim to
none.
I have something positive, I guess I can tell
you. If you pick up Centrum Vitamins, my dad wrote that line about them
having all the vitamins you need from A to Zinc. He was a very successful
copywriter...but never got into the big bucks of TV. When he was younger,
he worked for Bell and Howell out in Chicago. That's were he started his
collection of cameras! He's got some nice old ones! Sometime around
there in Chicago, I was born. Then when he got back to NY, he got into
medical advertising.
He got so many awards. He could have
really been a primo successful guy if he didn't have such a big mouth. He
never appreciated any of his awards. You see, he wanted to be the next
Ernest Hemmingway...But that's another story and one that I can't think of that
many jokes about right now.
