Women's Dictionary
>Airhead (er*hed) n. What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled over
>by a policeman.
>
>Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. A discussion that occurs when you're right,
>but he just hasn't realized it yet.
>
>Bar-be-que (bar*bi*q) n. You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce,
>chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat and cleaned
>everything up, but, he, "made the dinner".
>
>Blonde jokes (blond joks) n. Jokes that are short so men can understand
>them.
>
>Clothes dryer (kloze dri*yer) n. An appliance designed to eat socks.
>
>Diet Soda (dy*it so*da) n. A drink you buy at a convenience store to go
>with a pound of M&M chocolate covered peanuts.
>
>Eternity (e*ter*ni*tee) n. The last two minutes of a football game.
>
>Exercise (ex*er*siz) v. To walk up and down a mall, occasionally
>resting to make a purchase.
>
>Hair Dresser (hare dres*er) n. Someone who is able to create a style
>you will never be able to duplicate again. See also "Magician".
>
>Hardware Store (hard*war stor) n. Similar to a black hole in space...if
>he goes in, he isn't coming out anytime soon.
>
>Childbirth (child*brth) n. You get to go through 36 hours of
>contractions; he gets to hold your hand and say, "Focus... breath...
>push... Good Girl!"
>
>Park (park) v./n. Before children, a verb meaning, "to go somewhere
>romantic". After children, a noun meaning a place with a swing set and
>slide.
>
>Patience (pa*shens) n. The most important ingredient for dating,
>marriage and children. See also "tranquilizers."
>
>Valentine's Day (val*en*tinez dae) n. A day when you have dreams of a
>candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky
>to get a card.
>
>Waterproof Mascara (wah*tr*pruf mas*kar*ah) n. Comes off if you cry,
>shower, or swim, but will not come off if you try to remove it.
>
>Zillion (zil*yen) n. The number of times you ask someone male to take
>out the trash, then end up doing it yourself anyway.
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