Re: [MOL] Barbara Auslander Update [01494] Medicine On Line


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Re: [MOL] Barbara Auslander Update



Dear Christine, 

thank you and I have thanked each and all for their very brilliant and
caring opinions. I believe that is the strength of this forum, to share
our most inner thoughts and concerns so that we, as a family united on
one cause, can learn. I did. The outcome, in my view, was the right
decision for my wife, but all the views that were posted were right.
There are no wrongs. Thank you.

God Bless and glad to see you back.
marty and Barb auslander

Christine White wrote:
> 
> Well, let me be the dissenter in the group. If you were my husband, I would
> have wanted you to do exactly what you did. I don't think my doctor would
> have given the results to my husband but, had he known, I would want to be
> spared the extra anxiety and just wait for the doctor's report. Barb had a
> lovely weekend and you learned your lesson. You and Barb and in my thoughts
> and prayers as well as her doctors to find the right path for her.
> 
> Christine
> At 08:20 AM 22/06/99 -0700, you wrote:
> >Good Morning,
> >
> >Yesterday late afternoon, we had our consultation with the Doctor and as
> >expected he came in and told us that Barbs tumor had risen to 118 from
> >91. that was after two cycles or 6 weeks of chemotherapy. Barb has had a
> >third cycle since then. He did not waste anytime by offering some
> >thoughts and option. He said "Barb has a history of her body reacting to
> >any medicine slowly. Since she had her 3rd cycle of Topotecan he wanted
> >to immediately take another tumor marker to see if the tumor marker has
> >stabilized. If it has stabilized we will continue Topotecan. If not then
> >he suggested another chemotherapy called Gemzar (Gemcitibine)" I asked
> >him "doesn't Gemcitibine work best with Cisplatin?" . He said "yes but
> >since Barb has lost much of her hearing and has severe neuropathy in her
> >legs and feet and hands as a result of having 22 previous treatments
> >with cisplatin, he felt that Gemzar would be ok if administered alone so
> >that Barb could avoid the toxicity of Cisplatin". After the tumor marker
> >is taken this coming Friday, we will consult a week from FRi as the
> >tumor marker takes about 4 business days to process. WE will then decide
> >on which way to go. Now in light of that and a concern about treating
> >Gemzar alone and also since Barb has no known primary tumor, I will make
> >arrangements to consult with 2 other opinions, one from UCI and one from
> >USC. One Doctor is a gynogolocial oncologist, the other is a medical
> >oncologist. I also have calls into many other facilities to get
> >opinions.
> >
> >
> >I know there has been many  to suggest to me to tell Barb what the tumor
> >marker is, since I learned of this last week and had qualms about
> >telling Barb. I apprecieate all here that had advised me to tell her. In
> >fact I hadn't received one message that didn't tell me to advise her.
> >When Barb learned of the news, the Oncologist immediately went into
> >options to boost her hope. I could not do that as I am not an
> >Oncologist. He seemed to say the right things at the right time. To be
> >honest with each and everyone here, I am a coward, and I did not have
> >the heart to tell her. She had a glorious weekend and didn't even think
> >of what would happen when she saw the Doctor on Monday. To be honest
> >once again, I just did not have the heart to tell her. I know my wife
> >and I know if I had told her, that she would've been frightened all
> >weekend and the anticipation of what the Doctor might say would only
> >frighten her more. I would not have the answers to her questions other
> >than consoling her. So, I opted or I should say I could not tell her.
> >Call me whatever you wish, coward, nerd, whatever. I learned a lesson
> >and that was not to peek into the barrel before its time. Only one
> >person hurt there, and that was me. I had a miserable weekend. Well
> >thats over.
> >
> >I do wish to say to each and all those that have so compassionately
> >advised me, that I appreciate and respect each and every message. Hope
> >you all will continue to support us and advise. One other very important
> >thing. Thank you.
> >
> >Now, Barb and I will sit down this morning. WE have and will  discuss
> >many possibility of options. There are many calls to make to alternative
> >or conventional areas of HOPE and we will continuously discuss her
> >options and plans for wellness. We also plan to sit down this morning
> >and reflect back on what went right for her when she went into remission
> >two years ago. I know there are some things we have been complacent
> >about and need to rethink what needs to be accomplished.
> >
> >If you don't mind, I wish to continue advising others here, as I have in
> >the past, and wish to seek advice when needed. AGain, I am thankful for
> >all the messages of support and advice and deeply appreciated each. Hope
> >you know that.
> >
> >I will also respond today to each of your private messages. Thank you.
> >
> >God Bless You,
> >marty auslander
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