Re: [MOL] multiple myloma cancer [01413] Medicine On Line


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Re: [MOL] multiple myloma cancer



Hi Angie:  Well you have come to the right place to talk and you will meet
the most wonderful people on earth right here in this forum.  They all have
so much love and caring, no matter what their problems may be.  First, it
sounds as though your father may be in a depression, often this happens when
people feel they no longer have control of their lives.  Now the secret to
control is knowledge for knowledge is power, right?  It is the same when one
is scarred, if we truly have the knowledge about what we are afraid of we
gain control to cope with it.
I first suggest that your father go on to an anti depressant.  The next
thing I would suggest is that he works very hard at building up his immune
system.  Chemo and cancer play havoc on the immune system.  To build it up
you can use herbs and vitamins, things like Milk Thistle, soy products; etc.
Just make sure his Doctor knows what he is taking.  Then either meditation,
relaxing music and learning not to allow stressful situations to be around
you is very important.  The other thing is that cancer causes fatigue and
Chemo causes an added fatigue; so it is difficult to be yourself when you
are tired all the time. It would also help your father were he in a support
group.  Last; but certainly not least, it is unfair when doctors put a time
limit on, we have too many people on this forum right now that has far
surpassed any time limit.  This is counterproductive to healing.


Now that we have talked about your Dad, lets talk about you.  You need to
find out everything you can about your fathers type cancer and its
treatments.  It would be wise to get into a support group also.  You need to
be thankful that God has given you and your father a second chance to make
your relationship the very best it can be.  Our Dee just got back from
seeing her father, and all she talks about is how close they are, and we
hear this from others.  Cancer does not have to be a dread, it can be turned
into a positive.  Everything little laugh will mean that much more, you
learn to smell the flowers along the way.

So you have come to the right place to help you through the journey.  Good
luck and jump into any conversation you want, this is now your forum also
and you have joined a very caring loving family.  Your friend, Lillian
----- Original Message -----
From: Angela Peavy <APeavy1@Tandy.com>
To: <mol-cancer@lists.meds.com>
Sent: Friday, June 25, 1999 8:07 AM
Subject: [MOL] multiple myloma cancer


> My dad has had multiple myloma for a little over a year.  He has been on
> chemotherapy and is almost to the remission point.  He has been at that
> point for almost 6 months and gets real down and out every time he as to
go
> back to the doctor and finds out that he has to come back yet again for
more
> chemo.  I have had a very hard time dealing with the fact that he has this
> incurrable illness.  He has always been so active and well, now he is so
> quiet and down all the time.  I just don't know what to do.  We don't sit
> down and talk about it as a family and we never have.  I have so many
> feeling bottled up inside me and I have no one to share them with.  I am
> very scared.  I never imagined my life without my parents and now that my
> dad is sick, all I seem to do is think about what's going to happen when
he
> leaves us!  The doctor told us the life expectancy of 3-5 years and it
> scares me to think that he could be gone that soon.  I guess I'm not ready
> to accept it.  I wish my family and I could go to a support group or
> something like that, but when I wanted to do it, no one seemed to have the
> time.  I am hurting so bad for my dad and I am also scared to loose him.
He
> has always been there when I've needed him.
>
> I do have one question to ask regarding this cancer.  He used to laugh
alot
> and smile and be very energetic.  Now he is extremely moody and is always
> picking fights with everyone.  Is that normal or is it the medicine?  How
do
> I help him and my mom to deal with it?
>
> Thank you for taking the time to read this email and let me just vent for
a
> few minuets.  Like I said, I don't really feel I have anyone to talk to
> about this and I really need to talk just to get the feelings that are
> bottled up inside me out.
>
> Once again, Thank You for your time.
>
> Sincerely,
> Angie Peavy
>
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