Re: [MOL] Kathy & Jeanne... [00596] Medicine On Line

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Re: [MOL] Kathy & Jeanne...

Hi you two,
Here is my two cents worth.  You will find the older we get the less time we 
let grass grow under our feet, cause we just don't know how much longer our 
feet will be able to keep moving.  If you stand on the grass and never more 
on you would be very dull.  Just give this a thought, when you are fighting 
cancer for three months, it seems like a lifetime.  Now these two people 
fought a long battle with their spouses and deserve to get on with their 
lives, maybe I can see their side better being a caregiver.  Don and I have 
discussed this issue, and he would be very happy if I had someone even the 
next day after his death, he just doesn't want me to be alone, and he has 
gone so far as to start picking out who he would want me to marry.  I would 
not put my life on hold and morn him for no 3 months, knowing how short life 
can be I would get on with my life, and that is what he would want me to do.  
In that respect, I guess it is a personal issue and is not for us to question 
or judge, that is a job for the all mighty.
Jeanne maybe you should let go and be happy for the happiness they have 
found, their spouse's are no longer suffering, and they on doubt hashed over 
this issue, seems like a common issue that is discussed when you are faced 
with a terminal health problem like cancer.  Life is to short to be lonely 
and alone.
I too think your feelings are not the pity pot type, just give this issue a 
bit more thought and try hard not to judge, you might find yourself feeling 
better about this.
It is normal to miss the one that passed on, just keep it in perspective.
Smile and be happy.
Love ya both,
Nanc ():-)
In a message dated 6/11/99 10:43:27 AM Eastern Daylight Time, writes:

<< Subj:	 [MOL] Kathy
 Date:	6/11/99 10:43:27 AM Eastern Daylight Time
 Reply-to:	<A 
 Hi,Kathy, thanks for the reassurance. The kids, both sides had trouble
 with this as well. I hope that my husband would remarry IF I die before
 him. Hate to see a good man go to waste, but hope he would wait a bit
 longer than three months. I feel better. Cat is sitting at the windows.
 Our den is has three large windows facing south and it over looks a lot
 of trees. Our lovebirds in their cage are by the windows. Teddy our
 Himlayan sits on the patio table outside and watches them. When he wants
 to come in, he paws at the window. Which he is doing now, feeding time
 (not lovebirds) Have a good weekend and when will you be back on at
 home. Love, Jeanne
 > wrote:
 > Good morning, Jeanne:  Your feelings are quite natural, I think.
 > Doesn't sound like the pity pot at all to me.  I felt a certain sense
 > of outrage when my dear sister began to date another man after her
 > husband had been dead for a year.  I don't know what I expected -- for
 > her to spend the rest of her life mourning him, I guess.  Of course,
 > this wasn't fair to her.  She needed to get on with her life -- and
 > she has.  Now, I'm glad for her.  This man is very special in his own
 > right.  I hope they get married -- but three months!  I would have had
 > a very difficult time with that!  Love, Kathy >>
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