Oops, I should also applaud the party animal in you that is
going all out for the birthdays!! You have done exactly as you should and
taken the pressure of cooking out and left room for the joy of their birthdays
and the gathering of friends. You will be blessed 60 X 60!! When
that is all over I am sure that you will not be a dull lady!! LOL!!
Your place should look a little messy!!
I am doing well. I was getting a little beaten down and
feeling that panicky feeling of not understanding things again and then along
came the lesson.. Last Sunday when I left for church the fog was really
dense and I live in the country and drive 35 miles to church in the City..
Anyway, I couldn't see 10' in front of me and as I got to the intersection, I
didn't know what to do.. I couldn't see if anything was coming and this is a
very busy state route.. I sat there for several minutes not knowing what
to do and then I knew that if I was going to go at all, I needed to go and trust
that it would be okay. I asked God to get me there safely and pulled out,
crossed over and was safely (though blindly) on my way.
As I drove, I started to see that my life was very much like
the fog. I didn't know what was ahead, as I couldn't see but 10 feet in
front of me. I was fogged in and it was dense, cold and frightening.
It was then that I understood, that I needed to turn it all over to God, just as
I had at the intersection. I talked to God and told him that I couldn't
see and that I was afraid and that I was turning it over to him. I even
asked him for something to be said in church to let me know that I was on the
right path. After I did that, I could see the beauty in the fog. For
the first time, I saw glowing silver and found it to be truly
mesmerizing.
I got to church safely and on time. The service was
wonderful and there was indeed a part that spoke to my heart about the wisdom of
the soul and trusting in that wisdom. A new friend of mine sat with
me and we decided to have brunch after church. When we left the church the
sun was shining bright. It was a gorgeous day. After brunch we drove
around the area where I think I will probably end up living. I felt
comfortable that when it was time the right place would be there for
me.
I have so much trouble learning to let go and let God.
It seems that I have to be all the way on the floor, before I can let go of my
need to control the situation, fix the problem and make things right. So I
spend my fair share of time on the floor, until I give it up..
I think of you and am lifting prayers for you my friend.
I trust that you will honor and enjoy this day and this entire weekend.
You know there is a clock at the church bookstore that is very simple. It
is only white acryllic with very simple hands, and where each hour is, it says
now. There are 12 nows on the face of this clock.
Several years ago, I would have wanted to break that clock..
LOL! It would have constantly been reminding me that I needed to do
something else and that I wasn't through with what should be done now...
The pressure of too many things to do and too little me. :-) Today,
I think this clock is so very beautiful and it reminds me that the only time we
can own is right now, so now is the time to smile, now is the time to hug
someone, now is the time to tell someone that you care, now is the time to love
yourself, now is the time and we do control what we do right now.
May you Cori and all who read this, be full of the joy that is
now. God Bless you, many hugs and much love.. now! :-)
Carla.
