[MOL] Fwd: If Men Did Really Run the World [02124] Medicine On Line


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[MOL] Fwd: If Men Did Really Run the World



A friend sent this -- something to consider:

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If Men Really Ruled the World:>
 > >
 > > Any fake phone number a girl gave you would automatically forward  your  
call to her real number.
 > >
 > > Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable >
 > response to "I love you."
 > >
 > > Hallmark would make "Sorry, what was your name again?" cards.
 > >
 > > When your girlfriend really needed to talk to you during the
 game, > she > would appear in a little box in the corner of the
 screen during a > > time-out.
 > >
 > > Birth control would come in ale or lager.
 > >
 > > Each year, your raise would be pegged to the fortunes of the NFL
 > team > of your choice.
 > >
 > > The funniest guy in the office would get to be CEO.
 > >
 > > "Sorry I'm late, but I got hammered last night" would be an >
 acceptable > excuse for tardiness.
 > >
 > > At the end of the workday, a whistle would blow and you'd jump
 out > > your window and slide down the tail of a brontosaurus and
 right into > > your car.
 > >
 > > It'd be considered harmless fun to gather 30 friends, put on
 horned > > helmets, and go pillage a nearby town.
 > >
 > > Tanks would be far easier to rent.
 > >
 > > Instead of a beer belly, you'd get "beer biceps."
 > >
 > > Instead of an expensive engagement ring, you could present your >
 > wife-to-be with a giant foam hand that said, "You're #1!"
 > >
 > > Valentine's Day would be moved to February 29th so it would only
 > occur > in leap years.
 > >
 > > On Groundhog Day, if you saw your shadow, you'd get the day off
 to > go > drinking. Mother's Day, too. St. Patrick's Day, however,
 would > remain
 > exactly the same.  But it would be celebrated every month.
 > >
 > > Cops would be broadcast live, and you could phone in advice to
 the >
 > pursuing cops.  Or to the crooks.
 > >
.
y.
 > >
 > > The victors in any athletic competition would get to kill and eat
 the > > losers.
 > >
 > > The only show opposite Monday Night Football would be Monday
 Night > > Football from a Different Camera Angle.
 > >
 > > It would be perfectly legal to steal a sports car, as long as you
 > > returned it the following day with a full tank of gas.
 > >
 > > Every man would get four real "Get Out of Jail Free" cards per
 year.
 > >
 > > When a cop gave you a ticket, every smart-aleck answer you
 responded > > with would actually reduce your fine.  As in:  > Cop:
 "You know how fast > you were going?"  > You: "All I know is, I was
 spilling my beer all over
 > the place."   > Cop: "Nice one. That's $10 off."
 > >
 > > Faucets would run "Hot," "Cold," and "100 proof."
 > >
 > > The Statue of Liberty would get a bright red, 40-foot thong.
 > >
 > > People would never talk about how fresh they felt.
 > >
 > > Daisy Duke shorts would never again go out of style.
 > >
 > Telephones would automatically cut off after 30 seconds of >
 conversation.



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