Re: [MOL] sounding off [01738] Medicine On Line

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Re: [MOL] sounding off

Hi Diana,
I'm so sorry to hear your news and I understant your flustrations.  Please
vent as you must.  I know that Angelo just leaving us too has to add to your
feelings.  You know as we all do that you have to be strong for Rodney.  I
remember when I first heard that Don had cancer I felt like you too.  I used
to go down the basement to cry.  I did in front of him in the Doctors office
and could she how hard on him to see me cry.  When I just needed to scream, I
went out back in the woods and done just that.  It really did help.  Of course
I would be telling God how very mean that he was to infect such a wonderful
man at the same time.  It is a really rough life being a caregiver, isn't it?
Not that we don't like and feel good about doing it, but it can be so
frustrating.  There are times that I get mad at myself for not being able to
stay in control, I feel that I should because I'm not the one with the cancer.
These are all normal feelings Diana, so just quit beating up on yourself.
Please write or call anytime.  I just thank God every minute that I still have
my Don and that he is cancer free.  I am glad that the Doctor only gave him
until last Thanksgiving to live, cause it just makes me that much more
Much Love, Many Hugs & lots of Prayers to you and yours,

In a message dated 3/31/99 6:50:28 AM Eastern Standard Time, writes:

<< To anyone,
   I need to vent or I will explode.  Rodney went to the oncologist  on Monday
and his x-ray showed more cancer showing up in his other lung now.  He was
diognosed in May 98 with nsclc.  He also has mets to the brain.  He is so down
and so am i.  I feel like I did when we first found out he had cancer
devastated.  I don't like feeling like I am not in control.  At work I am
learning a new job and with trying to cope with Rodney's illness I just lost
it.  I took a few days off work to get myselt settled.  It's so much easier to
help someone else than it is youself and I don't like to feel weak.  Diana
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