>>>> Ole, Lena, and Sven were lost in the woods of
Northern >>>> Minnesota and were becoming desperate having run
out of food several >days >>>> ago. It was winter,
the snow was deep, their situation was looking very >>>>
bleak. When Ole dug down into the snow to look for nuts, he found
an >oil >>>> lamp and upon rubbing it to get the snow off,
a genie came out. >>>> >>>> The genie says,
"I am da great genie of Nordern Minnesooota and I can >>>>
grant each of you vun vish. >>>> >>>> " Ole
says, I vish I vas back on da farm and it was summer time
again." >>>> Poof, Ole was
gone. >>>> >>>> Next Lena quickly says, "I
vish I vas back on da farm wit
Ole." >>>> >>>> Poof, Lena was
gone. >>>> >>>> Sven was sitting there in the
bitter cold of the snow bank where the oil >>>> lamp was found
looking sad and the genie finally says, "Sven, vat
is >your >>>> vish?" .....and Sven says, "Gee,
I'm really lonely. I vish Ole and Lena >>>> were here
with me". >>>> >>>>
-------------------------------------------------------------------- >>>> >>>>
Sven was going for his morning walk one day when he walked past
Ole's >>>> house and saw a sign that said "Boat For
Sale." This confused Sven >>>> because he knew that Ole
didn't own a boat, so he finally decided to go >>>> in and ask
Ole about it. >>>> >>>> "Hey Ole," said
Sven, "I noticed da sign in your yard dat >>>> says 'Boat
For Sale,' but ya don't even have a boat. All ya have
is >your >>>> old John Deere tractor and
combine." Ole replied "Yup, and they're >>>> boat
for
sale." >>>> >>>>
======= >>>> >>>> One day Ole goes in to see his
doctor. Ole says, "Doc, I >>>> just don't know vat to
do. Lena and me, vell, our sex life just ain't >>>> going
dat vell." The doctor says, "Ole, all you need is some
exercise. >I >>>> want you to walk ten miles every
day. You give me a call in a week and >>>> let me know how
you're doing." So, a week later the phone >>>> rings and the
doctor answers it. A voice on the other end says,
"Doc, >>>> dis is
Ole." >>>> >>>> The doctor says, "Hello
Ole. Have you been walking ten >>>> miles every day?"
Ole says, "Yes." The doctor asks, "And has your
sex >>>> life improved?" Ole replies, "Well, how
da hell vould I know? I'm >>>> seventy miles avay
from home!" >>>>
======= >>>> >>>> Lena passed away and Ole called
911. The 911 operator told Ole that she >>>> would send someone
out right away. "Where do you live?" asked
the >>>> operator. Ole replied, "At da end of
Eucalyptus Drive." The operator >>>> asked, "Can
you spell that for me?" There was a long pause >>>>
and finally Ole said, "How 'bout if I drag her over to Oak Street
and >you >>>> pick her up
der?" >>>>
======= >>>> >>>> Ole was fishing with Sven in a
rented boat. They could not catch a >thing. >>>> Ole said,
"Let's go a vit furder down stream." So they did and
they >>>> caught many monstrous fish. They had their limit so
they went home. On >>>> the way home Sven said, "I marked de
spot right in de middle of de boat, >>>> Ole." "You
Stupid," said Ole, "How do you know ve vill get da same
boat >>>> next
time?" >>>>
======= >>>> >>>> Ole and Lena were laying in bed
one night when the phone rang, Ole >>>> answered it and Lena
heard him yell, "Vell, how da hell should I know, >>>> dats
over 2,000 miles away" and he hung up. Lena say's "who was
dat >>>> Ole?". Ole say's "hell if I know, some guy
wants ta know if da >>>> coast is
clear."
