Re: [MOL] Re: feelings and Photo Album [13516] Medicine On Line


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Re: [MOL] Re: feelings and Photo Album



Cathy,

Thank you so much for that wonderful story and tribute to your grandmother.  I
needed that.  I don't know what I expected this to be like, but it wasn't how it
is.  I feel like I have lost part of my identy, part of who I am, and have lost
one of my roles.  I know my dad is with me, but it isn't the same as having him
here.  I miss him very much.  I appreciate your support.

Sheila

Telesco,Cathy wrote:

> Sheila:
> I lost my grandmother 10 years ago to pancreatic cancer and felt just like
> you are feeling now.  My grandmother was a big part of my life and I used to
> have lunch with her everyday.  I was the same routine, I would call her at
> 11:30 am everyday and ask her what she was doing.  She would always reply
> that she was making lunch for me (my job was right around the corner).
> Right after her funeral I became angry when everyone was telling me that she
> can still see me..after all, no one died and came back to tell about it.
> But I think my lack of faith was due to the fact that someone very near and
> dear to me had been ripped out of my life.  That same night I had a dream
> about her.  I believe to this day however, that this was more that a dream
> because I asked her "what are you doing here?  You are supposed to be
> dead?'"  She started to speak and I quickly interrupted her.  I said" I have
> to ask you a question, is is true that you can still see me?"  And she
> replied, with a huge smile on her face, "if only you knew how I can see you
> now".   I still get goosebumps when I repeat this story because I knew it my
> heart that my grandmother is waiting to see me again some day.  And
> everytime something significant happened in my life she would appear to me
> (my engagement, wedding day, etc...).
> However, right after she died, when the funeral was over and everyone went
> on with their lives, at 11:30 am I would have a big empty space and not know
> what to do....it takes alot of time to heal from a great loss like the one
> you just experienced.      Cathy
>
> > -----Original Message-----
> > From: John & Sheila Lloyd [SMTP:tagteam@swbell.net]
> > Sent: Friday, July 31, 1998 2:12 PM
> > To:   mol-cancer@lists.meds.com
> > Subject:      [MOL] Re: feelings and Photo Album
> >
> > Cathy,
> >
> > First of all, thank you for your kind letter.  I wasn't talking of
> > leaving, I
> > just wanted you all to know where I was at.  I feel bad about not posting
> > as
> > much.  And I want to feel a part of again.  I know it is me, not you all
> > at
> > all.  I feel good that I am helping you.  I don't know how I would've
> > gotten
> > through the last couple of months without MOL.  I mean that.   Actually, I
> > haven't really felt a part of anything since my dad died.  I guess that is
> > some
> > of the grief.  I know that it will pass, I just wish it would hurry.  I
> > know I
> > can't rush this, it hasn't even been 3 weeks, but on one hand it seems
> > like it
> > was just yesterday, and then it also seems like it has been forever.
> >
> > You and your kids crack me up.  Tell your four year old that I wear jeans
> > and
> > t-shirts, and that I look nothing like that in real life.  LOL  Though I
> > wish.
> >
> > Sheila
> >
> > Telesco,Cathy wrote:
> >
> > > Ross:
> > > You're right, I have not submitted a photo.  I want to submit one of my
> > > father and I but have not had the chance to dig up a picture yet.  I
> > will
> > > though, I promise.  Also, since I don't have a scanner I will probably
> > have
> > > to mail the picture to another moler who can kindly scan it for me.
> > Don't
> > > worry about not getting back to me, I tried it again the next day and it
> > > works fine!  Go figure!  I do enjoy looking at all the pictures.  The
> > other
> > > day my 4 yr old daughter saw the beautiful picture of Sheila and
> > asked.."wow
> > > mommy, does she wear that when she is talking to you?"  I couldn't stop
> > > laughing.....She was really impressed with Sheila...Cathy
> > >
> > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > From: Ross Ylitalo [SMTP:raylital@mtu.edu]
> > > > Sent: Friday, July 31, 1998 1:29 PM
> > > > To:   'mol-cancer@lists.meds.com'
> > > > Subject:      RE: [MOL] Photo Album
> > > >
> > > > Dear Cathy,
> > > >
> > > > The problem could be one of three things.
> > > >
> > > > The first being that I don't recall getting a photo submission
> > > > from you.  If you haven't submitted a photo and bio, you are
> > > > not allowed to view the Album (Just kidding :)
> > > >
> > > > The second thing is I see the "Number of Visitors" odometer
> > > > is full--it only goes to 999,999.  Maybe it got stuck right there?
> > > > I'll go and shop around for a new odometer as soon as I get
> > > > a chance.
> > > >
> > > > The last possibility is kind of obscure, but for the purposes
> > > > of completeness, I'll include it anywas:  there are a lot of
> > > > things that can go wrong, but I can boil it down to this type
> > > > of summary:  for some reason, internet browsing software
> > > > isn't/wasn't recognizing "Frames."
> > > >
> > > > I can only guess, but you might start by going through your
> > > > preference options and looking to see if you have an option
> > > > to allow or disallow the viewing of Frames.  I just looked in
> > > > my Internet Explorer, and was surprised to find I wasn't able
> > > > to find such an option--I thought I saw that somewhere once.
> > > > Hopefully you'll have better luck.
> > > >
> > > > I'm pretty sure older browsers don't support frames, but that
> > > > might not be the problem, since you say you saw them before.
> > > > (Frames allow the viewing of the list of MOL'ers on the left side
> > > > of the Rose.)
> > > >
> > > > Sorry I've been slow in responding--speaking of slow, I've been
> > > > thinking it would be nicer if I removed the music and the spinning
> > > > logo, as they take up additional time to download when one
> > > > visits the page.
> > > >
> > > > I'm waiting on my computer now...maybe I'll go and see if I can
> > > > steal a few minutes to throw some new photos into the Album!!!
> > > >
> > > > Love,
> > > >
> > > > Ross
> > > >
> > > > -----Original Message-----
> > > > From: Cathy Telesco [SMTP:Cathy.Telesco@gte.net]
> > > > Sent: Tuesday, July 28, 1998 1:48 PM
> > > > To:   mol-cancer
> > > > Subject:      [MOL] Photo Album
> > > >
> > > > Ross:
> > > > I just went to the photo album site and only get the Home page with
> > the
> > > > Rose and music and # of visitors.
> > > > When I accessed it before, I used to get everything.  I wanted to see
> > the
> > > > new additions.  I don't know what I
> > > > am doing wrong.
> > > > Cathy
> > > >
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