Dear Jean
Thank you and I do have to say that I learn a lot from these children. It
is so heartbreaking to see what so many children are going thru. I don't
think that what is happening is anything new but that society is now
accepting responsibility for things that were once hidden and not
discussed. With the amount of drugs around today there is probably just
more children in need. My letter last night to Liz was so long that I
didn't say why I became an advocate. My older son and his significant
other have 2 babies and drinking and drugs were involved. They live 5
hours away from us. The turmoil was unbearable and I made call after call
to our state services for help for these children. They would check it out
and things would be ok for a little while. They (Services for Children and
Families) finally called me in Feb of 97 to ask if I would take the babies
while my son and his girl attended alcohol and drug counciling and domestic
violence counciling. They were 13 months and 2 1/4 years old boys. I took
care of them for 10 months while mom and dad did what they had to do. Mom
got the boys back Dec 20, 1997. She is much better but dad (my older son)
did not finish his treatment. He is with us also, right now, and he is
about to be on his way as he can't seem to stop the drinking. He's working
but wants that beer when he gets off work. We've discussed this and we
don't know how to help him as it seems he doesn't want to stop. Tough love
again...he will probably be asked to leave tonight. He did go thru 4
months of treatment so he has the knowledge but not the want. My boys were
not raised with alcohol and John and I were not raised with alcohol. It
just sort of started......I guess like Rich's cancer, no one on either side
with cancer, just started. In treatment both boys have had to share the
issues of their life and have both told us on separate occasions that they
feel bad after hearing what their peers have gone thru with alcoholic and
drug addicted parents. They said there were horror stories that they just
couldn't believe. Rapes, beating, neglect, mental abuse like they didn't
know existed. Older son will leave tonight and Rich will probably have
social security soon and then John and I can live in our house along for
the first time in our marriage. Yea!!!!! We both need that right now.
They are old enough to live their life how they want. Like someone said
earlier, "What would they do if you wern't there?"
Back to the CASA program. I had just became a CASA 5 months before taking
the babies. It is such a worthwhile program and I've learned a lot about
court reports and the social system. Anyone interested please let me know
and I will find a number for you to call. You don't have a great deal to
do with the children thereselves except to make sure they look good. You
can't drive them around in your car. You mostly interview people involved
and check the records at social services and visit once every 2 weeks and
then submit court reports on your views about how the case is going. The
judges here love the CASA's and rely heavily on our word.
Jean, did I miss the e-mail with your brother's response after you mailed
him back? How did it go? Are you both staying in touch? I hope so. I
have two brothers and we've been pretty close all our lives. It helps when
my husband is their best friend too. Boy I talk a lot.. Love to you
Vicci
----------
> From: Thomas A Johnson <jtjohnson@juno.com>
> To: mol-cancer@lists.meds.com
> Subject: [MOL] Vicci
> Date: Wednesday, July 29, 1998 5:21 AM
>
> Vicci,
> I just want to say God bless you for doing the work that you do! When we
> were children, my brothers and I had to go to court to tell the judge
> which parent we wanted to live with - a very traumatic experience. It's
> so nice to know there are advocates for children in crisis like this. I
> don't recall there being one for us back then. You should be proud of
> yourself for doing such valuable work. Children are so helpless within
> families in turmoil.
> -Jean
>
> _____________________________________________________________________
> You don't need to buy Internet access to use free Internet e-mail.
> Get completely free e-mail from Juno at http://www.juno.com
> Or call Juno at (800) 654-JUNO [654-5866]
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
> This is an automatically-generated notice. If you'd like to be removed
> from the mailing list, please visit the Medicine-On-Line Discussion Forum
> at <http://www.meds.com/con_faq.html>, or send an email message to:
> majordomo@lists.meds.com
> with the subject line blank and the body of the message containing the
line:
> unsubscribe mol-cancer your-email-address
> where the phrase your-email-address is replaced with your actual email
> address.
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is an automatically-generated notice. If you'd like to be removed
from the mailing list, please visit the Medicine-On-Line Discussion Forum
at <http://www.meds.com/con_faq.html>, or send an email message to:
majordomo@lists.meds.com
with the subject line blank and the body of the message containing the line:
unsubscribe mol-cancer your-email-address
where the phrase your-email-address is replaced with your actual email
address.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
