Re: [MOL] rich [12749] Medicine On Line

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Re: [MOL] rich

Dear Martha,
Boy you had a real rough time.  I can't even imagine being that sick.  And
then all because of a quack doctor.  You surely did not need that on top of
everything else.  Did this happen 7 years ago or since then with the
reoccurance?  Either way I'm so sorry you had to go thru that.  I wish
there were ways to go on this journey without all the sickness and pain. 
It's seems like you've been double whammied.  First, learning of it and
then the fight to be cancer free.  I do appreciate your taking the time to
inform me about what could happen.  I am just so new to this and haven't
had to go thru anything like it.  I need to know the up's and down's and
It truly will help me.  I already know that if this makes him sick at all
I'll have trouble on my hands.  If he doesn't feel well he will want to
stay in bed and I'm going to have to figure out a way to make him go to the
next treatment.  I'm not sure I would want to go either.  How did you make
yourself go day after day when you were so sick?  

His throwing up has ceased for 4 days now.  I think that when I say he
doesn't let the fear show that he's holding it inside and that could have
been making him sick.  And no, I don't think he has a clue to what's about
to happen to him or he's just not going to get upset before he needs to.  I
can't figure this kid out anymore.  But then I never have figured him out. 

I will and am trying to stay stress free.  I'm lightening my work load and
delving it out to others.  I'm not sure exactly where you are with your
journey tho...7 years after the mastectomy, where did it reoccur?  And how
are you today?  I hope well and happy and not having to fight too hard a
battle.  Thanks for the big hug.  Hubby comes in every 1/2 hour or so and
gives me a neck massage.  He tells me I'm a good mommy.  So see, I do have
him (John) to lean on and boy it feels good.  Just like talking to you and
my other friends here.  

The colostomy and cleaning the PICC Line are his chores and he's handling
it very well.  I don't remind him to vacuate the PICC and he's still in
training with the ostomy nurses but did change it by himself last time he
went to see them.  The ostomy nurses are just thrilled with the job the
doctor did on him.  They say that some are so bad they cause big problems
forever.  Rich has a beautiful one....can you imagine?  a beautiful
colostomy?  I guess this is their job and when they see one they like they
let you know.

Well Martha, I got 2 e-mails answered tonight and an update on Rich.  I
will have to start again tomorrow.  

Much love to you and thank you for taking the time to explain a lot of
things to me!      Vicci

> From: Martha S Cerreto <>
> To:
> Cc:
> Subject: [MOL] rich
> Date: Monday, July 20, 1998 4:18 AM
> Dear Vicci,
> I'm sorry to hear about how things are going with Rich.  I wish I could
> give some helpful advice; it's so hard in any case, giving advice long
> distance, when you don't know all the particulars.  
> It sounds like you're saying he's been an overgrown adolescent for a long
> time.  If there's a positive side, I do admire his confidence.  It took
> years to develop whatever confidence I have now.  When I started my
> with cancer, I was so scared all the time that I couldn't do anything but
> be grateful for the care and concern I got from my family.
> I'm a little concerned or confused about how he's getting sick, i.e.,
> throwing up, but going out and partying with friends.   Also, I hope he
> taking care of his colostomy by himself and doing a good job.  
> The facts are that you guys certainly aren't going to be around forever,
> and he is going to have to learn to take care of himself.  The facts are
> that many people have colostomies, go to work with them, do important
> with them, but in general, this is still a society where most people
> want to hear about such things or illness period, and it won't be easy
> him.  I do like to emphasize the positive, but the world can be a cold,
> cold place.
> The pot smoking, at least in published reports, is said to be helpful to
> reduce the nausea of chemotherapy, but he isn't getting any yet.  Let me
> tell you about my experience with chemotherapy.  I only got one dose. 
> After that, I changed doctors, because the first told me I wouldn't get
> sick from the chemo and I got real sick.  I was not at all prepared, so
> that made it worse.  I lived in the bathroom for at least three days.  My
> husband moved up the cushion from our old sofa, and brought in some
> pillows.  Otherwise, there was just me and my walkman and a big bottle of
> spring water.  I kept throwing up and throwing up.  Everytime I got done
> with one episode, I felt better for about 5 seconds and then felt sick
> again.  Besides throwing up I tried to listen to the radio and slept a
>  For the next three days, I still pretty much lived in the bathroom but
> able to migrate out to my bedroom a little and watch TV.  During this
> period of time, there was extreme nausea where I felt like I wanted to
> throw up.  I don't know what was worse, the throwing up or the nausea.   
> Then, as I started to be able to eat, there was a good ten days or so of
> extreme physical weakness where it felt like it took a herculean effort
> do something like stand up from a sitting position.
> I don't say this is what things will be like for Rich; I don't know.  I
> certainly hope not.  I have certainly learned of late, that even among
> women who've had chemo for breast cancer, many tolerate it much better
> I did.  But Rich is in a war, and he doesn't seem to know it or that he's
> being shot at or where his weapons are.
> Oh, I almost forgot.  After the first six days, I had an asthma attack. 
> There was so much going out; I don't know, all of a sudden I couldn't get
> anything in.
> The first time my husband took me to the hospital.  They gave me some IV
> steroids and I started to feel better so I said could I go home.  I never
> had an asthma attack before; I didn't know. Of course, they said fine. 
> Once I got home, it started back up again.  By this time, it was late in
> the evening, so I called 911.  They were not too happy to see me back in
> the hospital, as neither was I to be there!  They put me back on the
> medicine which finished up about 2:30 in the morning.  I didn't want to
> call my husband at that hour, so I said, PLEASE let me stay until morning
> to make sure everything's allright.  Luckily they did.
> When I found a real doctor, and he got all my papers from the quack I had
> gone to, he told me you never needed any chemo; I think we could
> you on hormonal meds, which indeed has happened.
> I don't know if this is helpful to you; only you know how you might use
> somehow to help Rich.  I guess the gist of what I'm trying to say is that
> this is reality and it isn't always very pleasant and he may have things
> waiting in the wings for him that aren't very pleasant either.  And the
> sooner he comes to grips with that, and bears down to get ready for it,
> better off he'll be and the better chance he'll have to get through it
> successfully.  
> Oh, I think it's pretty well established that pot smoking leads to
> just like cigarettes only it takes less time.
> One other thing Vicci, for you.  I had a good seven years of good health
> from my mastectomy to my reoccurrence last December.  I am firmly
> that a lot of work-related stress I was undergoing for several years had
> lot to do with the reoccurrence.  You must find a way, even with all
> dealing with to take care of yourself.  Stress is really the pits.
> Big hug, Vicci, and a lot of pats on the head,
> Martha Cerreto
> P.S:  I'll get back to you about colostomy org.      
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