Oh, Bernie, it's so good that you're talking to them about it. I know
too well that fear for loved ones about what might happen if they don't
get the answers they want from God. But anger is a pretty natural part
of grief and healing, and scriptures (especially the Old Testment) show
that many of God's people were angry with him at times. I guess it 's
part of any intimate relationship.
But I hear your deeper fear; what if he becomes so angry with God that
this situation causes him to lose faith in God? For starters, at some
point in time, everyone faces situations we wish had turned out
differently. It's a crossroads of sorts, and we have to choose. Is God
trustworthy, or not? If he really cares about me, why do these things
happen? It helps to face those tough questions when you already have a
loving relationship with God, but I've known many adult believers to
struggle with this; it's where faith is really tested. It's hard to see
your son face it so early in life, but if it wasn't this, it would have
come eventually, and that's something we can't protect anyone from.
Another question that surfaces is, can I be angry with God and still be
in relationship with him? The answer to that is a definite yes. In fact,
anger can be the beginning of a truly authentic reltionship with God (it
was for me, and very liberating, too, to be able to admit it), but many
people don't realize that, and so they deny or try to hide the anger
they feel. It can be a relief to know that it's ok -- God knows how you
feel and he can take it.
So keep talking with both your sons. Name the demons, let them name
their demons, let them know about your own ambivalent feelings....and
that in spite of it all, you know God is there and cares. You're in my
thoughts and prayers, Bernie. May God give you the words, but more
importantly, the peace in your heart that will speak louder than words.
Love, Joicy
Beth4770@aol.com wrote:
>
> Dear Joicy,
> You are so right "the One who made them does love them even more" I am just
> concerned that if they pray and don't get the answers that they want that they
> will be angry with God. We have had a lot of conversations about this. My
> youngest (12) wants to be a priest (we are Catholic) so he is pretty ok
> about it all. The older one (14) is at "that age" and may be a harder sell.
> Have a great day.
> Love Bernie
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