[MOL] Re: Emmett [08639] Medicine On Line

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[MOL] Re: Emmett

Emmett, you have heard from some others already about the various ways of
dealing with it...  It is not a pat answer as each one is different and each
persons cancer is also different..

I am 45 and went in for a biopsy last November and woke up minus my right
lung.  NSCLC adenocarinoma Stage IIb with one lymph  node involved and no
distant metastases.  My other name is Carla!  LOL!

When I woke up, I only heard and understood what I wanted to and that was
that they got it all.  I have come to learn that means that they got clear
margins.  I didn't know for 4 weeks after surgery that there was any reason
to even see an oncologist..

When I got home from the hospital, all I could think about was getting
better and getting back to my life.  After I saw the oncologist all I could
think about was whether or not I was going to have a life.  That was when I
logged on to the computer and started doing my research.

The results of that research scared the begeebies out of me!  I knew right
then, that if I truly believed all of that then I was doomed.  I went to see
a second oncologist and like him alot as a person with admirable ideas, but
he never even examined me.  I ended up back at my surgeon's asking for help.
I was also in a stress period..  I asked him what he thought about this
coming back.  He said that honestly he couldn't tell me.. That it does on
some and doesn't on others.  He referred me to an oncologist, who I still
see now.

What my surgeon told me about the fact that it comes back to some and not to
others started me on the search for information.  I sure wanted to know
about the ones that it doesn't come back on.  When I saw my oncologist, he
and I disagreed about treatment.. he wanted to be aggressive and do chemo
and I felt an inner voice saying no.  After a few weeks I still said no and
he told me to do whatever I believed in, as what I believed would

That was when I knew that the mind played a role in this cancering
journey... I had the faith in God and had several hundred people praying for
me, but I knew that I also needed to learn about the minds of survivors..
That is where this forum has been so good.

The first thing I did was to buy Greg Anderson's book "50 Essential Things
to do when the Doctor says its Cancer".  I started researching supplements.
I changed my diet and got a treadmill and slowly built up to a walk..
Having only one lung truly changes much about the way you breath and if you
do when you are tired!!  LOL!!

I went on to buy other books and learn alot from the people here and I
started sharing with others and responding to others and that is when I got
the next boost and learned the lesson that in giving, you will receive.  I
was also able to share my faith in God and hope in life message and each
time I did, it grew a little stronger in me.

I am just now getting ready to try some meditation..  Now, last November I
would have told you no way on so many things that I now do, but I have
learned  that getting rid of toxic stress is very important and so my life
has been changing in so many ways.

The cancering journey (verb=action, and I hated feeling helpless) has truly
turned out to be an experience by which I have gained so much.  I have found
out some of the best things about me;  I have learned that it is a blessing
to feel love and share your heart with others,  I have learned that quality
of life truly means more than quantity of life, I have learned that I cannot
control the exact time that God will call me to join Him, but I can know
that it will be His time, not a medical statistical prediction.

I have even learned to laugh alot more.  I used to be so serious about
everything...  I was the one always pushing to get it done immediately and
perfectly...   Now I know that there is no such word as perfect on this
earth.  I used to be one of those drivers that had a few choice comments for
the lesser drivers I encountered and now I take a few deep breaths and find
someother focus.  I used to huff and puff in crowds and stores and now I try
to be the one to smile, for you truly don't know what has just happened to
someone else...  They didn't know when it happened to me.

All of this my only way of sharing some of what I have learned for me over
the past 7 months...If there is anything here that will help you, please
take it... it is freely given and never has to be earned.  I don't believe
that God gave me cancer, but I believe that He allowed me to have it,
because He needed me to change.  I am embracing the change and allowing the
light to shine in me and through me.

May God Bless you with your course lighted for the cancering journey and
give you the faith to believe that you will be a survivor and the comfort to
take you through the highs and lows of the medical journey, but most of all
may He allow you the smiles of hope and sharing...  Carla
-----Original Message-----
From: Emmett <esauer@aeneas.net>
To: mol-cancer@lists.meds.com <mol-cancer@lists.meds.com>
Date: Saturday, May 23, 1998 7:36 PM
Subject: [MOL] Hi!

>My name is Emmett, I joined this list a few days ago and have been getting
>some good reading.  I am 52 and found out the first of April that I have
>Non-Small-Cell Stage IIIA Lung cancer.
>I am taking two radiation treatments a day and one chemo per week.  I had
>(and still have) the initial shock of finding this out, I am dealing with
>it better now than I was a month ago.  My family is very supportive as are
>the customers that I have (I am an ISP & Webmaster in Tennessee).
>Wondering the different ways that any of you may have in confronting
>Thanks for listening..
>Emmett Sauer                     Aeneas Internet Services of Henry Co.
>esauer@aeneas.net (901)644-7980        http://paris.aeneas.net
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