Jean, thanks so much for the powerful reminder; it can't be said enough
times or enough ways...love, joicy
>
> My brother-in-law opened the bottom drawer of my sister's bureau and
> lifted
> out a tissue-wrapped package. "This," he said, "is not a slip. This is
> lingerie." He discarded the tissue and handed me the slip. It was
> exquisite; silk, handmade and trimmed with a cobweb of lace. The price
> tag
> with an astronomical figure on it was still attached. "Jan bought this
> the
> first time we went to New York, at least 8 or 9 years ago. She never wore
> it. She was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this is the
> occasion." He took the slip from me and put it on the bed with the other
> clothes we were taking to the mortician. His hands lingered on the soft
> material for a moment, then he slammed the drawer shut and turned to me.
> "Don't ever save anything for a special occasion. Every day you're alive
> is
> a special occasion." I remembered those words through the funeral and
> the
> days that followed when I helped him and my niece attend to all the sad
> chores that follow an unexpected death. I thought about them on the plane
> returning to California from the Midwestern town where my sister's family
> lives. I thought about all the things that she hadn't seen or heard or
> done. I thought about the things that she had done without realizing that
> they were special. I'm still thinking about his words, and they've
> changed
> my life. I'm reading more and dusting less. I'm sitting on the deck and
> admiring the view without fussing about the weeds in the garden. I'm
> spending more time with my family and friends and less time in committee
> meetings. Whenever possible, life should be a pattern of experience to
> savor, not endure. I'm trying to recognize these moments now and cherish
> them. I'm not "saving" anything; we use our good china and crystal for
> every special event-such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped
> the
> first camellia blossom. I wear my good blazer to the market if I feel
> like
> it. I'm not saving my good perfume for special parties; clerks in
> hardware
> stores and tellers in banks have noses that function as well as my
> party-going friends'. "Someday" and "one of these days" are losing their
> grip on my vocabulary. If it's worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want
> to
> see and hear and do it now. I'm not sure what my sister would have done
> had
> she known that she wouldn't be here for the tomorrow we all take for
> granted. I think she would have called family members and a few close
> friends. She might have called a few former friends to apologize and mend
> fences for past squabbles. I like to think she would have gone out for a
> Chinese dinner, her favorite food. I'm guessing-I'll never know. It's
> those
> little things left undone that would make me angry if I knew that my
> hours
> were limited. Angry because I put off seeing good Friends whom I was
> going
> to get in touch with-someday. Angry because I hadn't written certain
> letters that I intended to write-one of these days. Angry and sorry that
> I
> didn't tell my husband and daughter often enough how much I truly love
> them. I'm trying very hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything
> that would add laughter and luster to our lives. And every morning when I
> open my eyes, I tell myself that it is special. Every day, every minute,
> every breath truly is...a gift from God. If you've received this it is
> because someone cares for you and it means there is probably at least
> someone for whom you care. I can tell you it certainly won't be the
> last..
> You've seen the result of this neglect in your own relationships that you
> have allowed to fade, dissolve, and fall into disrepair. Take this
> opportunity to set a new trend. Take a few minutes to send this to a few
> people you care about, just to let them know that you're thinking of
> them.
> It's even better I they're not the people you already correspond with
> every
> week. Here's the deal: "You've got to dance like nobody's watching, and
> love like it's never going to hurt."
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