Re: [MOL] Linda, it's okay. [00876] Medicine On Line


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Re: [MOL] Linda, it's okay.



Dear Linda,
Yes, it is okay to feel low, I agree with Lillian. After 14 years I still
miss my "daddy", even sometimes still dreaming and crying. He was such a
good friend to me. I don't know, maybe it is God's way of keeping him fresh
in my mind and heart.

I did not have anyone to turn to when he passed. My sisters and brother had
their families and my mom reclused herself and would speak to no one but my
brother-in-law for a long time. I went through a year of hell, keeping
everything bottled up inside. I alienated friends  -  who did not
understand. Keeping it inside was so unhealthy. But sincerely, at the time
I did not know who to turn to but God, who has been there for me all my
life.

So grieve and rage, scream, cry, laugh out loud, if that's what you feel
like you really need. Take all the time in the world to come to grips with
this loss. Allow your soul to go through the different feelings and
emotions you will face. When I met my hubby I was able to finally do that.

Dad never met my kids or my hubby, but my kids know him and we all believe
that he can somehow see the joys in our life from up there in Heaven. My
three year old loves to look at his pictures and talk about her "grandpa in
heaven." 

Although we often can't understand, logisize or even rationalize the flow
of things on our life - but one thing remains constant - that is God and
His love. May He be with you through this time.

Sincerely,
Traci
----------
> From: mol-cancer@lists.meds.com
> To: TheSperrys
> Subject: [MOL] Linda, it's okay.
> Date: Monday, January 19, 1998 6:49 PM
> 
> Dear Linda:  It's okay to feel sorry for yourself, you had a big loss and
> eventually you will find your strength through your tear's.  I hope you
will
> stay on line, you could be so valuable  to other caretakers who need to
draw
> on someone elses strength because you've been there, you know what works
and
> what doesn't work.  Most of all have no regrets, it was simply time for
your
> sister and you had no control over that.  There are no what if's.  My
mother
> and her sister both died in my arms, it hurt so much; but I knew they
died
> the way they wanted too, it was my greatest gift to them and yes even
after
> all these year's it hurts.  My mother was my best friend and if I can be
> only half as good as she was, then I will make it on th road of life.  We
> are all here for you Linda, and by your helping other's who are in the
same
> situation you will heal faster.  Hope work goes okay for you too.
> Your friend Lillian
> 
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