[MOL] How to Prepare for a Mammogram! [02602] Medicine On Line


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[MOL] How to Prepare for a Mammogram!



How to Prepare for a Mammogram!

Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there is no need to
worry!
.By taking a few minutes each day for the week preceding the exam and
doing
the following exercises, you will be totally prepared.  And the best of
all,
you can do these simple exercises right in the privacy of your own home.

EXERCISE #1
Freeze two metal bookends overnight.  Strip to the waist.  Invite a
stranger
into the room.  Place a bookend on each side of a breast.  Smash the
bookends
together as hard as you can.  Make an appointment with the stranger to
meet in
one year and do it again.

EXERCISE #2
Open your refrigerator door and insert one breast between the door and
the
main box.  Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut as hard
as
possible and then lean heavily on the door.  Hold that position for five
seconds.  Repeat in case the first time was not effective.

EXERCISE #3
Visit your garage a 3 a.m. when the temperature of the concrete floor
should
be perfect.  Remove all of your warm clothes and lie comfortably on the
floor
with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car.  Have an invited
stranger slowly back the car until the breast is sufficiently flattened
and
chilled. Turn over and repeat the procedure for the other breast.

CONGRATULATIONS!  You are now properly prepared for a mammogram.




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