[MOL] Fwd: SPEECH GOOFS [00919] Medicine On Line


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[MOL] Fwd: SPEECH GOOFS




>Subject: Fwd: SPEECH GOOFS
>
>>>                        HUM: Speech Mistakes (***1/2)
>>>           =================================================
>>>
>>>                                SPEECH GOOFS
>>>
>>> "I want to make sure everybody who has a job wants a job"
>>>  --George Bush, during his first Presidential campaign
>>>
>>> "This is a great day for France!"
>>>  --Richard Nixon, while attending Charles De Gaulle's funeral
>>>
>>> "Now, like, I'm President. It would be pretty hard for some drug
>>guy to
>>> come into the White House
>>> and start offering it up, you know? ... I bet if they did, I hope I
>>> would say, 'Hey, get lost. We don't
>>> want any of that."
>>>  --George Bush, talking about drug abuse to a group of students
>>>
>>> "For seven and a half years I've worked alongside President
>>Reagan.
>>> We've had triumphs. Made
>>> some mistakes. We've had some sex ... uh... setbacks."
>>>  --George Bush
>>>
>>> "I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom
>>and
>>> democracy. But that could
>>> change."
>>>  --Dan Quayle
>>>
>>> "Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific. It is
>>in the
>>> Pacific. It is a part of the
>>> United States that is an island that is right here."
>>>  --Dan Quayle during a visit to Hawaii in 1989
>>>
>>> "What a waste it is to lose one's mind--or not to have a mind.
>>How true
>>> that is."
>>>  --Dan Quayle addressing the United Negro College Fund
>>>
>>> "I am honored today to begin my first term as the Governor of
>>> Baltimore-that is Maryland."
>>>  --William Donald Schaefer, first inaugural address
>>>
>>> "The caribou love it. They rub against it and they have babies.
>>There
>>> are more caribou in Alaska
>>> than you can shake a stick at."
>>>  --George Bush, on the Alaska pipeline
>>>
>>> "I hope I stand for anti-bigotry, anti-Semitism, anti-racism.
>>This is
>>> what drives me."
>>>  --George Bush
>>>
>>> "If I listened to Michael Dukakis long enough I would be
>>convinced that
>>> we're in an economic
>>> downturn and people are homeless and going without food and
>>medical
>>> attention and that we've got
>>> to do something about the unemployed."
>>>  --Ronald Reagan
>>>
>>> "My fellow Americans, I've signed legislation that will outlaw
>>Russia
>>> forever. We begin bombing in
>>> five minutes."
>>>  --Ronald Reagan, about to go on the air for a radio broadcast,
>>unaware
>>> that the microphone was
>>> already on
>>>
>>> "Mars is essentially in the same orbit. Mars is somewhat the same
>>> distance from the sun, which is
>>> very important. We have seen pictures where there are canals, we
>>> believe, and water. If there is
>>> water, that means there is oxygen. If oxygen, that means we can
>>> breathe."
>>>  --Dan Quayle
>>>
>>> "Now we are trying to get unemployment to go up and I think we're
>>going
>>> to succeed."
>>>  --Ronald Reagan
>>>
>>>                   GREAT MOMENTS IN POLITICAL DEBATES:
>>>
>>> Walter Mondale: George Bush doesn't have the manhood to
>>apologize.
>>> Bush: Well, on the manhood thing, I'll put mine up against his
>>any time.
>>>
>>>                               FOREIGN GOOFS
>>>
>>> "Bite the wax tadpole."
>>>  -- Coca-Cola as originally translated into Chinese
>>>
>>> "Pepsi brings your ancestors back from the grave."
>>>  -- ad slogan "Pepsi Comes Alive" as originally translated into
>>Chinese
>>>
>>> "I am a jelly doughnut"
>>>  --English translation of John F. Kennedy speaking at the Berlin
>>Wall
>>>
>>> "We pray for MacArthur's erection."
>>>  --sign erected by Japanese citizens in Tokyo, when MacArthur was
>>> considering a run for President
>>>
>>> "You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid."
>>>  --from a guest directory at a Japanese hotel, 1991
>>>
>>> "It takes a virile man to make a chicken pregnant."
>>>  --Perdue chicken ad, as mistranslated abroad
>>>
>>>                               MISCELLANEOUS
>>>
>>> "I'm not against the blacks and a lot of the good blacks will
>>attest to
>>> that."
>>>  --Evan Mecham, then governor of Arizona
>>>
>>> "Nixon has been sitting in the White House while George McGovern
>>has
>>> been exposing himself to
>>> the people of the United States."
>>>  --Frank Licht, then governor of Rhode Island, campaigning for
>>McGovern
>>> in 1972
>>>
>>> "Retraction: The 'Greek Special' is a huge 18 inch pizza and not
>>a huge
>>> 18 inch penis, as described
>>> in an add. Blondie's Pizza would like to apologize for any
>>confusion
>>> Friday's ad may have caused."
>>>  --correction printed in The Daily Californian
>>>
>>> "Winfield goes back to the wall. He hits his head on the wall and
>>it
>>> rolls off! It's rolling all the way
>>> back to second base! This is a terrible thing for the Padres!"
>>>  --Jerry Coleman, Padres radio announcer
>>>
>>> "I want you to take your balls in your hand and bounce them on
>>the floor
>>> and then throw them as
>>> high as you can. Now, have you all got your balls in your hands?"
>>>  --announcer of children's radio show "Life With Mother" to her
>>audience
>>>
>>> They X-Rayed my head and found nothing.
>>>  --Jerome "Dizzy" Dean
>>>
>>> "The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nation's
>>history...this
>>> century's history.... We all lived
>>> in this century. I didn't live in this century."
>>>  --Dan Quayle
>>>
>>> ______________________________________________________
>>> Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>
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