Re: [MOL] The Meaning of Serenity [02904] Medicine On Line


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Re: [MOL] The Meaning of Serenity



Dear Vicci,
I agree. I envy those who have found serenity. Maybe someday I will. Now
don't get me wrong; I am not unhappy. In fact I am quite a happy person,
but I don't seem to be able to just relax and let things go. I am always
taking on all kinds of projects and sometimes I just feel like I am on a
treadmill..
Liz P.

>Dear Liz,
>Now I don't feel so all alone either.  I've thought all day about what I
>wrote to Joicy and felt kinda bad but then I also felt very truthful.  The
>way I see it is........Lucky Joicy.  She was able to do it.  I felt like I
>was challenging her a bit, you know.....so make me see the light or try.
>Nothing else has worked.  I envy her and all the others that can have that
>calm and serene feeling knowing they've put theirselves in God's hands.
>Dear Joicy,  I'm not talking behind your back, honey.  I was surprised to
>hear from another MOLer on this subject.  You know how everyone is afraid
>to talk about politics and religion.  I thought we did quite well.  I do
>envy you and if I try hard enough someday the light may come on in my
>brain.  Love you both.....Vicci
>
>----------
>> From: Elizabeth Patterson <eapat@ewa.net>
>> To: mol-cancer@lists.meds.com
>> Subject: Re: [MOL] The Meaning of Serenity
>> Date: Friday, August 28, 1998 6:56 AM
>>
>> Dear Vicci,
>> You have just put into words my feelings about religion. I was raised to
>go
>> to church every Sunday and to learn the articles of faith and all the
>> commandments and the Christian rules and regulations, but I never "Saw
>the
>> Light." And I still don't. Interestingly enough I believe in the
>Christian
>> philosophy "Love thy Neighbor as thyself". And I never knowingly take
>> unfair advantage of anyone or do others wrong (maybe that's why I'll
>never
>> have any money), but I don't have the kind of religious conviction that
>> allows me to place all my faith and trust in God. Maybe I am a control
>> freak, but I have always run  my own life and taken responsibility for my
>> own actions.
>>
>> I wish I could just hand my problems over to God and trust that all is
>> well, but I can't. Now I don't feel so alone in my views.
>>
>> Liz P.
>>
>>
>> >Dear Joicy,
>> >Wow.....how do I answer this?  First of all I would never take offense
>from
>> >a friend trying to help, especially you.  You wrote a very caring and
>> >inspirational letter and I thank you.  I guess I just don't know how to
>do
>> >what your asking.  As a child I went to a little Protestant church in
>our
>> >neighborhood and had fun and put my little quarter in the basket with my
>> >brothers.  Then I started going to the Mormon church with the two girls
>> >next door.  When I was old enough to stand up and give my testimonial I
>> >quit.  I learned scriptures and verses and went till about 15 years of
>age.
>> > Got that far before I was being encouraged to testify.  I guess that
>> >scared me.  Not wanting to talk to a group of people.  I've heard the
>> >phrase, "Let go, Let God"  Most of the people I know that go to church
>> >preach the word but don't live the word.  And many others I don't know
>> >personally don't live up to what I assume they are being taught in the
>> >church.  I know it's not fair to pray only when you need something very
>> >badly but I find a comfort in living my life as best I can without
>hurting
>> >others.  I try to think before saying a hurtful thing.  I try to put
>myself
>> >in the other persons shoes before criticizing.  I'm not making excuses
>but
>> >I just haven't felt the thing you have felt about going with God.  I'm
>> >definetly open to it.  But what do I do, go to church and hope it
>happens?
>> >It makes me very uncomfortable when people start talking religion and I
>> >know how they lead their lives.  I've often thought I would take my
>> >granddaughter and go down the street to the little church.  Give it a
>try.
>> >Maybe I will.  How come it's so easy for some to just all of a sudden,
>> >believe?  Why is it so hard for some of us.  I do believe in a higher
>power
>> >but sometimes I just think about the karma of a situation and that's
>enough
>> >to make me change something.  Like not throwing my gum out the car
>window
>> >because I know gum will come into my life somehow.  I'll step in it or
>the
>> >car in front of me will sling it up on my car.  I'm not making light of
>> >this, I'm telling you exactly how I think about things.  I don't step on
>> >ants, intentionally.  I always let a driver pull in my lane.  Just
>stupid
>> >little things.  I'm probably not getting the drift of what you're trying
>to
>> >tell me but I swear I just don't understand.  I've often thought how
>easy
>> >it would be to have some help....so why doesn't it come?  Why aren't I
>hit
>> >over the head, being I'm so hardheaded.  It sure would be easier than
>> >trying to handle all this myself.  Maybe I'm a control freak.  Sounds
>like
>> >it took some convincing on your part also.  Maybe I will get that book
>and
>> >write a few things down.  Just to see what happens.  Just don't give up
>on
>> >me, Joicy!  Where there's a will, there's a way, huh?  Love you!   Vicci
>> >
>> >----------
>> >> From: Joicy Becker-Richards <joicy@erols.com>
>> >> To: mol-cancer@lists.meds.com
>> >> Subject: Re: [MOL] The Meaning of Serenity
>> >> Date: Wednesday, August 26, 1998 6:43 PM
>> >>
>> >> Dear Vicci,
>> >> With all that is going on in your life these days, I'm not surprised
>> >> you're feeling kind of shaky, dear friend. And when everything is
>> >> stirred up, it is so hard to find perspective. Unfortunately, there is
>> >> no easy fix -- though folks will always hunt for it in meds, drugs,
>> >> alcohol, money, etc., etc. Speaking from personal experience, I've
>found
>> >> only one source for that kind of serenity: knowing that there is
>higher
>> >> power with a plan... I tried for so long to "do it all" on my own,
>with
>> >> disasterous results. Finally, in desperation, I gave up and literally
>> >> issued God a challenge: "Ok, you think you can do better with my life?
>> >> Go for it! But I'm keeping notes!" And I did -- and he did. I mean, I
>> >> really put him to the test -- as things went wrong, or I needed help,
>> >> I'd make note of it in a journal, and then watch to see how he'd
>resolve
>> >> it. What amazed me is that I was always willing to settle for mediocre
>> >> solutions, when God wanted to give me the best -- his answers always
>> >> exceed my expectations.
>> >>
>> >> Oh, the stories I could tell... But the real test came 3 years ago as
>I
>> >> sat in a bath, dicovered a lump, and knew I had breast cancer. And in
>> >> spite of it, like the mother bird in the story, I felt an impossible
>> >> serenity, "the peace that passes all understanding," as the scriptures
>> >> describe it. And that feeling stayed with me, even during the worst of
>> >> it, with bad reactions to chemo, etc. We have a very powerful God.
>It's
>> >> tough turning things loose to him, but wow! the things that happen
>when
>> >> you do!
>> >>
>> >> Anyhow I share this with you as a friend, with love and concern for
>all
>> >> you're going through, and the hope I haven't offended. You and your
>> >> family continue to be in my prayers. Love, Joicy
>> >>
>> >> Vicci Ewen wrote:
>> >> >
>> >> > Oh to feel serene like that mother bird.  I kinda feel shaky most of
>> >the
>> >> > time lately.
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>>
>> Liz P. Of Yakima
>>
>>
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