Re: [MOL] The Meaning of Serenity [02668] Medicine On Line

[Date Prev][Date Next][Thread Prev][Thread Next][Date Index][Thread Index]

Re: [MOL] The Meaning of Serenity

Dear Joicy, do I answer this?  First of all I would never take offense from
a friend trying to help, especially you.  You wrote a very caring and
inspirational letter and I thank you.  I guess I just don't know how to do
what your asking.  As a child I went to a little Protestant church in our
neighborhood and had fun and put my little quarter in the basket with my
brothers.  Then I started going to the Mormon church with the two girls
next door.  When I was old enough to stand up and give my testimonial I
quit.  I learned scriptures and verses and went till about 15 years of age.
 Got that far before I was being encouraged to testify.  I guess that
scared me.  Not wanting to talk to a group of people.  I've heard the
phrase, "Let go, Let God"  Most of the people I know that go to church
preach the word but don't live the word.  And many others I don't know
personally don't live up to what I assume they are being taught in the
church.  I know it's not fair to pray only when you need something very
badly but I find a comfort in living my life as best I can without hurting
others.  I try to think before saying a hurtful thing.  I try to put myself
in the other persons shoes before criticizing.  I'm not making excuses but
I just haven't felt the thing you have felt about going with God.  I'm
definetly open to it.  But what do I do, go to church and hope it happens? 
It makes me very uncomfortable when people start talking religion and I
know how they lead their lives.  I've often thought I would take my
granddaughter and go down the street to the little church.  Give it a try. 
Maybe I will.  How come it's so easy for some to just all of a sudden,
believe?  Why is it so hard for some of us.  I do believe in a higher power
but sometimes I just think about the karma of a situation and that's enough
to make me change something.  Like not throwing my gum out the car window
because I know gum will come into my life somehow.  I'll step in it or the
car in front of me will sling it up on my car.  I'm not making light of
this, I'm telling you exactly how I think about things.  I don't step on
ants, intentionally.  I always let a driver pull in my lane.  Just stupid
little things.  I'm probably not getting the drift of what you're trying to
tell me but I swear I just don't understand.  I've often thought how easy
it would be to have some why doesn't it come?  Why aren't I hit
over the head, being I'm so hardheaded.  It sure would be easier than
trying to handle all this myself.  Maybe I'm a control freak.  Sounds like
it took some convincing on your part also.  Maybe I will get that book and
write a few things down.  Just to see what happens.  Just don't give up on
me, Joicy!  Where there's a will, there's a way, huh?  Love you!   Vicci

> From: Joicy Becker-Richards <>
> To:
> Subject: Re: [MOL] The Meaning of Serenity
> Date: Wednesday, August 26, 1998 6:43 PM
> Dear Vicci,
> With all that is going on in your life these days, I'm not surprised
> you're feeling kind of shaky, dear friend. And when everything is
> stirred up, it is so hard to find perspective. Unfortunately, there is
> no easy fix -- though folks will always hunt for it in meds, drugs,
> alcohol, money, etc., etc. Speaking from personal experience, I've found
> only one source for that kind of serenity: knowing that there is higher
> power with a plan... I tried for so long to "do it all" on my own, with
> disasterous results. Finally, in desperation, I gave up and literally
> issued God a challenge: "Ok, you think you can do better with my life?
> Go for it! But I'm keeping notes!" And I did -- and he did. I mean, I
> really put him to the test -- as things went wrong, or I needed help,
> I'd make note of it in a journal, and then watch to see how he'd resolve
> it. What amazed me is that I was always willing to settle for mediocre
> solutions, when God wanted to give me the best -- his answers always
> exceed my expectations.
> Oh, the stories I could tell... But the real test came 3 years ago as I
> sat in a bath, dicovered a lump, and knew I had breast cancer. And in
> spite of it, like the mother bird in the story, I felt an impossible
> serenity, "the peace that passes all understanding," as the scriptures
> describe it. And that feeling stayed with me, even during the worst of
> it, with bad reactions to chemo, etc. We have a very powerful God. It's
> tough turning things loose to him, but wow! the things that happen when
> you do!
> Anyhow I share this with you as a friend, with love and concern for all
> you're going through, and the hope I haven't offended. You and your
> family continue to be in my prayers. Love, Joicy
> Vicci Ewen wrote:
> > 
> > Oh to feel serene like that mother bird.  I kinda feel shaky most of
> > time lately.  
This is an automatically-generated notice.  If you'd like to be removed
from the mailing list, please visit the Medicine-On-Line Discussion Forum
at <>, or send an email message to:
with the subject line blank and the body of the message containing the line:
unsubscribe mol-cancer your-email-address
where the phrase your-email-address is replaced with your actual email