[MOL] Mens guide [02534] Medicine On Line


[Date Prev][Date Next][Thread Prev][Thread Next][Date Index][Thread Index]

[MOL] Mens guide



 
 
 At long last... The Men's Guide to what a woman really
 means when she says something. Pay close attention (there
 might be a quiz later).
 
 
          You want = You want
 
          We need = I want
 
          It's your decision = The correct decision should
 be obvious by now.
 
          Do what you want = You'll pay for this later.
 
          We need to talk = I need to complain
 
          Sure... go ahead = I don't want you to.
 
          I'm not upset = Of course I'm upset, you moron!
 
          You're ... so manly = You need a shave and you
 sweat a lot.
 
          You're certainly attentive tonight. = Is sex all
 you ever think about?
 
          I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting! = I'm
 on my period.
 
          Be romantic, turn out the lights. = I have flabby
 thighs.
 
          This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new
 house.
 
          I want new curtains = and carpeting, and
 furniture, and wallpaper.....
 
 
          I need wedding shoes = the other 40 pairs are the
 wrong shade of white.
 
          Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there!
 
          I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost
 asleep.
 
          Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something
 expensive.
 
          How much do you love me? = I did something today
 you're really not going to like.
 
          I'll be ready in a minute. = Kick off your shoes
 and find a good game on T.V.
 
          Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful.
 
          You have to learn to communicate. = Just agree with
 me.
 
          Are you listening to me!? = [Too late, you're
 dead.]
 
          Yes = No
 
          No = No
 
          Maybe = No
 
          I'm sorry. = You'll be sorry.
 
          Do you like this recipe? = It's easy to fix, so
 you'd better get used to it.
 
          Was that the baby? = Why don't you get out of bed
 and walk him until he goes to sleep.
 
          I'm not yelling! = Yes I am yelling because I
 think this is important.
 
          All we're going to buy is a soap dish = It goes
 without saying that we're stopping at the cosmetics
 department, the shoe department, I need to look at a few
 new pocket books, and OMIGOD those sheets would look great
 in the bedroom and did you bring your checkbook?
 
          (The answer to "What's wrong?")
 
          The same old thing = Nothing
 
          Nothing = Everything
 
          Everything = My PMS is acting up
 
          Nothing, really = It's just that you're such an
 asshole
 
          I don't want to talk about it = Go away, I'm still
 building up steam
 
  >>