HewRon@aol.com wrote:
>
> Thanks, Jo.
>
> The messages from M.Woods show the terrible trials that cancer brings to our
> relatives and friends. People who have lived with cancer longer than yours
> truly may have advice to give. To me, it is a new environment, so I feel
> poorly qualified to provide uplift to those sharing the pain and depression
> of their loved ones. Of course literature and magazines are awash with
> advice on how to lift oneself up when confronted with all kinds of problems.
> We all have to find our own ways to deal with our own situations. But it is
> instructive to know that others are facing the same doubts and dilemmas,
> reassuring to know that even strangers are thinking of us, rooting for us,
> willing to share with us their stories, which at least put our own problems
> into perspective.
>
> In my own case, as an unmarried person with a gloriously helpful friend, I
> have very little to complain about -- except the cancer itself! I just have
> to deal with it, which is a damn nuisance, cleaning those broviac tubes daily
> and all. (By the way, for those who don't know, a broviac is a device that is
> fitted into your chest so that most chemical treatments and blood tests don't
> require hypodermic intrusions into your veins.) Then there are the hospital
> stays for "consolidation", which I've mentioned before, the first of which
> begins tomorrow at 1 p.m., when I'll be admitted to one of New York's biggest
> hospitals, where the nurses mean well but there aren't enough of them. On my
> last stay (the big initial stay -- five weeks), on one occasion I had to wait
> 45 minutes for a painkiller! Now there's a subject we should perhaps deal
> with in this group -- the understaffing of even the finest hospitals now that
> all medical procedures are profit-driven. Or would such a discussion be too
> political?
>
> Through all this the friend I mentioned has been a rock and a compass. What
> does he, healthy fellow, know of cancer? But throughout he has been by my
> side, learning along with me. He has been present at my most personal
> examinations (the presence of a friend or family member at such moments is, I
> believe, a great gift they can give). He has shown the love of a true friend
> -- unconditional.
>
> So I have little to complain of. And yet, one reads, those newly diagnosed
> with cancer will feel rage. I had felt resentment, but not rage, until a
> couple of days ago. It soon passed. When I told my doctor about it on
> Tuesday, he said "Good." I shall probably feel it again, but it will pass
> again too. A week or so ago, when the first cool weather of autumn hit New
> York (I always thank God for the first cool weather, loving winter as I do),
> I was walking alone (if one can ever be alone in Manhattan!) when I felt
> something very near rapture, a great "Yes!". It had something to do with the
> flower-laden streetmarket, something to do with my dear friend, then on
> business on the other side of the country. Perhaps it had most to do with the
> thought that, whatever happens, there can be happiness even with cancer.
>
> Those were selfish thoughts, but I share them anyway. What I had meant to
> write about was the stress and actual pain felt by the friends and relatives
> that visit us in hospital, that worry for our future, that sit with us in
> doctors' offices awaiting the results of blood tests. They worry and suffer
> more than we know. They may not show their suffering, and they may be the
> brunt of our understandable occasional irritability, but they stand by us.
> And we should let them know how we treasure them.
>
> Tomorrow I journey to the East Side and open up my body to a liquid that will
> continue the process begun during my initial hospital stay. My doctor tells
> me my blood is now normal except for the white-cell count, which is, however,
> rising. I am not vulnerable (he says) to other people's colds etc. When my
> five-day stint is over, the blood count will be temporarily reduced, the side
> effect of the action in my bone marrow. That is why self-injection is needed:
> to bring the blood count back up.
>
> So this may be my last message until I return -- next Wednesday, the doctor
> says. So all the best to you all. Courage to all of you who are struggling
> with the invader. And thanks, and courage too, to all you helpers who are
> proving your love and friendship.
>
> See you!
>
> -- Ron
>
> ------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ron,
I know we all look forward to your return next Wednesday and pls never
feel your thoughts are selfish when sharing your feelings here or to
any support group or people who are tying to learn and be educated when
hearing other experiences. We open our arms to you and all those that
undergo these trying times of getting well and the means to do it. We
are here for you. Take care my friend.
Marty
------------------------------------------------------------------------
This is an automatically-generated notice. If you'd like to be removed
from the mailing list, please visit the Medicine-On-Line Discussion Forum
at <http://www.meds.com/con_faq.html>, or send an email message to:
majordomo@lists.meds.com
with the subject line blank and the body of the message containing the line:
unsubscribe mol-cancer your-email-address
where the phrase your-email-address is replaced with your actual email
address.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
